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My novel's first chapter needs a critique. Editor for whole thing also welcome.


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Hi all,

I'm working on my first novel (!), for a local contest.

It's an urban fantasy with a caribbean flavor. I'm in the middle of chapter 2 right now.

Since the first chapter is so important in a novel, I'm hoping to get some immediate feedback so I can make sure I don't paint myself into a corner with bad choices.

Anyone interested in taking a look at the first chapter?

Also, if anyone likes that first chapter enough, they're welcome to stick around to help with the rest.

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Hi all, I'm working on my first novel (!), for a local contest. It's an urban fantasy with a caribbean flavor. I'm in the middle of chapter 2 right now. Since the first chapter is so important in a novel, I'm hoping to get some immediate feedback so I can make sure I don't paint myself into a corner with bad choices. Anyone interested in taking a look at the first chapter? Also, if anyone likes that first chapter enough, they're welcome to stick around to help with the rest.

I can help you with a first chapter, though I can't guarantee I can stick around after that. I specialize in fantasy so you have me intrigued. My email is on my author page.

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Read Noah Lukeman's book, The First Five Pages. There's tons of good advice on how to make the first chapter of your story -- indeed, the first five pages -- get the novel moving.

One trick that took me a long time to learn is to start each scene from the middle. Avoid the temptation to go through the entire thing from the very beginning. Read any major published novel (or any major film), and you'll see they use this trick often.

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