(Ele)Civil Disobedience

Dearest, dearest EleCivil. You forgot Bruce Willis and you're weird, but nevertheless I so wish you'd been teaching in my school. How are the plans for the time machine coming along?

I love the ambiguity. It'd be tempting to respond to each interpretation by saying, "yeah, you're right. I'm exactly that guy you guessed. I'm so glad the subtlety of my design hasn't been wasted on you."Then when the whole farce of multiple identities collapses into recrimination and accusations of deceit, you present the grand reveal that you've come as Stone Cold Steve Austin affecting the guise of Brian Cranston's interpretation of Wee Hughie as a paranoiac-critical method homage to Anton LaVey.

Not just that you could tell who reads comics. You could tell who reads good comics.

Not just that you could tell who reads comics. You could tell who reads good comics.

Hahaha, true. Oh, Garth Ennis. You with your interesting characters and storytelling buried under ten tons of intestines and bodily fluids.

Spock's Beard! Gotta watch those mirror universe Vulcans! One of my favorite episodes.

OK, what about mirror-Cartman with the goatee? (Naturally, he killed Kenny.) Can't remember if it was the Planet'Arium episode. I don't really watch South Park regularly.

But I'll second the vote. I did have a few cool teachers, including a few cool guy teachers. OK, I thought so anyway. But I didn't have a teacher quite as cool as EleCivil.

Wait, you left out Kwai Chang Caine with a goatee. What? Did he ever have a goatee? Heck if I know, man. But if it's "cool bald guys," he qualifies.

Out of touch with popular culture? Whatever gave you that idea?

Uh, what about bald girls? No, without the goatee. A bald girl with a goatee would be a little hard to wrap my brain around. But apparently, I have a thing for bald girls. :shrugs: I'd just, uh, rather it was a guy.

Psst, Ben? The existential crisis thing, really, deal, wouldja?

This summer, I actually considered shaving my head. Saves money and it's cooler in summer. Downside: colder in winter too, sunburn my paleface bald head in summer. Bigger downside: I'd probably look like a cue ball with Really Big Ears, you know, Alfred E. Newman, but bald and without the freckles. So maybe shaved head isn't the best look for me. But who knows, I might try it, if next summer is as freakin' unbelievably freakin' hot as this one was, or if my budget continues to suck rocks.