Vampirism
Entry posted by EleCivil
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True story:
Student 1: "Mr. Civil, Student 2 just tried to bite me!"
EC: (Turns and glares at Student 2) "I knew it!"
Student 2: "What?"
EC: "You're a vampire! I've been saying it for years, but does anyone ever listen to crazy old Mr. Civil? No. Well, now they'll see that crazy old Mr. Civil isn't really all that old. I mean, crazy." (Rolls up a newspaper into a cone.)
Student 1: "What are you doing?"
EC: "What must be done. Hold still, Student 2, you're going to feel a slight stakey sensation."
Student 2: "I'm not a vampire!"
EC: "That's exactly what a vampire would say."
Student 1: "That's paper. The stake has to be made of wood."
EC: "Well, paper is made from wood pulp...which is made out of wood. I'm sure the transitive property applies to vampire slaying."
Student 2: "I'm not a vampire!"
EC: "...You sure?"
Student 2: "YES!"
EC: "Oh. Well, then. Stop trying to bite people. Now, where were we? Math? Yeah, let's do some math."
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