Altimexis

I'm putting the finishing touches on a five-part novella that continues the saga of a the boys of New York City. With Kyle's dads, Jake and Ken, getting married and their honeymoon in the offing, what could be better than spending ten weeks in Europe? Kyle and his brother, Roger, are invited, and so is Kyle's boyfriend, Freck. As Jake and Ken put it, what better way to enjoy Europe than through the eyes of their sons. But Freck is about to begin a journey of self-discovery as he realizes he still has a fair bit of healing to do, and discovers that having a Jewish boyfriend is only a part of his connection to the Jewish people. Stay tuned for Funny, You Don't Look Jewish, coming to AD soon. And be on the lookout for a Thanksgiving tale as well.

Cole swore he'd never write a sequel, yet he wrote Another Summer in Georgia. Never say never.

The next story in the New York Stories series, The Cajun Asian, will be posted soon. A lot happens in this story, including the completion of renovations to Seth's family's apartment and a surprise fifteenth birthday party that accidentally becomes clothing optional. No orgies, though, as everyone will be way too busy watching a Star Trek marathon. Gary is finally set to realize his dream of opening a Cajun restaurant when tragedy strikes, and it falls to Seth and Asher to turn the dream into reality.

Oops, since the story is being posted first at CW, I posted my own review over at the CW forum, not realizing there was already a thread going here. There isn't much to add, though, as most of my concerns have already been expressed by everyone else. I would definitely note the following, however, as I would have thought the school would've been much more involved from the getgo: From the beginning, something seems a little off, and it has nothing to do with the writing. The situation the protagonist finds himself in is horrible - so horrible that he completely shut down for seven weeks and didn't even bother to notify the school of what had happened. Perhaps I'll turn out to be wrong about this, but things can't all be what they seem. For one thing, why didn't the school reach out to him? Yes, Edison is supposed to be a big high school, but an entire family being killed in a home invasion should have been big news. Surely someone - a teacher, the principal or Kevin's counselor would have been aware of the situation. Why would the school have treated him as AWOL? I went to a high school with 3600 students in three grades, yet when my dad died of a heart attack, my U.S. History class sent me flowers. A couple of my teachers came to the funeral. The principal sent me a card. No one expected me or my mom to notify the school of my absence. A few days later, my counselor called to see how I was doing and to ask when I'd return. Colin has gone into exquisite detail with this story as he always does, so this is truly a glaring inconsistency that perhaps portends greater mystery ahead. And as everyone else has already noted, the kid's in danger: Kevin's family wasn't simply murdered - they were executed. Their killers marched them out of the house, lined them up in the back yard, had them lay face-down and then systematically shot each of them in the head. Startled robbers don't do that. Crazed druggies, high on PCP, don't do that. Kids undergoing a gang initiation don't do that. This was a carefully planned execution. The only reason Kevin wasn't killed supposedly was that he was away at a tennis match as I recall, so I think it's probably safe to assume that in some bizarre plot twist, Kevin wasn't the killer. But if this was an execution and if the perps are still at large as we've been lead to believe, why isn't Kevin in danger? Would the police really let him move back into his house so soon after the crime? Are they really that inept, or are things not as they seem? One thing's for sure - or maybe not - the way Colin left the end of Chapter 11 seemed pretty ominous.

It's been a while since I posted something here, but Life Can Be Lonely by Colin Kelly is an interesting story that at first blush seems like yet another of Colin's brilliant, feel-good stories. Without giving anything away, from the beginning, something seems a little off, and it has nothing to do with the writing. The situation the protagonist finds himself in is horrible - so horrible that he completely shut down for seven weeks and didn't even bother to notify the school of what had happened. Perhaps I'll turn out to be wrong about this, but things can't all be what they seem. For one thing, why didn't the school reach out to him? Yes, Edison is supposed to be a big high school, but an entire family being killed in a home invasion should have been big news. Surely someone - a teacher, the principal or Kevin's counselor would have been aware of the situation. Why would the school have treated him as AWOL? I went to a high school with 3600 students in three grades, yet when my dad died of a heart attack, my U.S. History class sent me flowers. A couple of my teachers came to the funeral. The principal sent me a card. No one expected me or my mom to notify the school of my absence. A few days later, my counselor called to see how I was doing and to ask when I'd return. Colin has gone into exquisite detail with this story as he always does, so this is truly a glaring inconsistency that perhaps portends greater mystery ahead. Now for some spoilers:

The saga of the boys at Stuyvesant High School in New York City continues this weekend and next with two new stories. First up is a long one - just shy of 25k words - Bullying Starts in the Home. This poignant tale picks up the story of Clarke, the bully who slugged Asher in gym class. The following Saturday will feature a much shorter tale about the rekindling of love long lost - Reminiscing About the Future. A third story is in the works and will be posted later in the summer - The Cajun Asian. There will be more to follow.

It amazes me how different authors go about writing their stories in different ways. On the one had there are authors like GA's Comicality, who writes long soap opera-like stories that never end. On the other hand are authors like Merkin, who writes very brief stories and stitches them together to form a whole. Some authors start posting long before a story is complete, and others don't publish until the story is finished, edited, beta read and reread. My favorite genre is writing short story collections, as I can write each story as an independent unit that builds on previous stories, without worrying where the series may be heading. However, I've also written full novels such as Legacy and Conversations with Myself, which was the most complex story I've ever written. In both cases I had a clear vision of where I wanted the story to go, but both took unexpected directions and the endings ended up being dramatically different than originally planned. Some authors use an outline to be sure they stay on-track. My stories are mostly character-driven and can be as unpredictable as the characters within them. I like to think that makes the stories seem more real in the end. Alan, your story was excellent as always. I agree with Merkin that the first semester in college was the right place to end it. The final paragraph was probably something better left to the imagination of the reader, but it's your story to tell and not mine. I'd love to see a sequel to Unfinished Symphony - that was a great story! For a lot of authors, once a story ends, they prefer to move onto something else. Others write endless sequels because they can't let go. Since I tend to write short story collections, I'm always writing sequels, but I always bring my stories to an end. Sometimes a reader suggests something I hadn't thought of and that becomes the basis of a sequel.

I loved how this story progressed, but the last chapter sure seemed rushed. Perhaps there wasn't much more to say about Tyler's education, but it felt like Alan just wanted the story to be over. Further, summarizing the rest of Tyler's life in a single paragraph only heightened the sense that there was a lot left out. I've read quite a few stories where the ending feels rushed and the reader is always left with the feeling that they've been shortchanged. In many ways, I think it's better to end a story sooner and to leave some threads hanging, so long as the ending is satisfying. Alternatively, the entire story can be told as a flashback, which provides a framework for summarizing things in the end.

Me too, and gratified.

I've really loved this story since it was first posted seven years ago. It's one of Cole's best short stories. It's particularly apropos today with xenophobia on the rise around the world, and Trump trying to build a wall to keep all those 'depraved' refugees from entering the U.S. and raping our women. I wonder if the Canadians will build a wall to keep the Americans out, should the worst predictions of climate change come true. Demonizing whole populations has always been a favorite tool of the demagogue. Why should America give shelter to a poor Muslim boy from Kyrgestan, and his whole family? Why should we offer refuge because he says he's being prosecuted because of who he is? He and his family should have stayed and fought for their rights. They're probably just economic refugees anyway. I doubt Cole could have foreseen the Trump presidency or the rise of the political right worldwide, but he did such a superb job of putting a human face on a refugee family - one with a persecuted gay kid.

I loved this story, but I wondered, do girls still wait for boys to ask them to a school dance? Perhaps it's different elsewhere, but I was under the impression that here in NYC, it goes both ways now.

Trek or Treat and Thanksgiving Dinner tell the story of two New York gay teens who come together through a shared love of Star Trek, Classical Jazz and a penchant for endless discussions of controversial topics. The story will continue with the posting of three more stories in the coming weeks. Thanksgiving Dinner introduces a new character in Part 3, Kyle, a nearly 10-year-old who understands advanced calculus and can read at a 12th grade level. He's also 100% certain that he's gay, but with no love at home, has very troubling thoughts about his future. In Chanukah Gift, we'll meet 'Freck', a freckle-faced nearly 12-year-old gay high school sophomore with a troubled past that includes drug use and a nearly successful suicide attempt. The theme is serious, but the story is written for all ages to enjoy. Could love be the greatest Chanukah gift of all? Christmas Storms is another 3-part novella that continues the stories of Asher, Seth, Kyle and Freck. As might be expected, the storms are both figurative and real. All four boys will become closer to their boyfriends and as friends to each other. Freck will discover his true calling and Kyle will realize where his future should lie. Asher and Seth's relationship will continue to grow as they prove to be the best friends Kyle and Freck could ever have. New Year's Resolutions will be the concluding chapter in the saga of the New York kids, although I never rule out the possibility of future stories based on my characters. What starts out as a bet ends in a New Year's Eve party in which all the boys dress in drag and all the girls dress as boys. Much fun is had and a lot of things are resolved, but a surprising reconciliation is the main theme at the end of the day.

You wouldn't believe how rapidly things are changing in Manhattan. It's a little hard to tell from the panorama shot I used at the head of the story, but the dominant building in the foreground is a new 80-story condo going up on the site of the old ParhMark grocery, which was destroyed by Sandy. It's not exactly a spot I would have envisioned for a luxury building either. Although it borders the FDR and East River, It's basically surrounded by housing projects. Such is the value of the land in Manhattan. There are three more apartment buildings planned along the river, with significant neighborhood opposition as you might imagine. Battery Park is highly built-up with luxury apartments, in spite of being in the worst flood plane in the city. There are so many young couples living there that you have to watch for women on their smart phones with baby strollers, crossing the street. It used to be a daily hazard I encountered on my way to the Holland Tunnel. The original Star Trek aired when I was in fifth through seventh grades. It was truly groundbreaking but it was done on such a low budget that the mechanical doors on the turbo lifts were operated by hand, quite literally. There is at least one instance where a stagehand's hand is visible in the final take. The planets they visited all looked about the same, with only the background changing, and there were never clouds in the sky. The bridge of the Enterprise was so low-tech that it didn't even match the sophistication of most automobiles of the era, which were already pretty low-tech. Of course where the series really shone, and occasionally crashed and burned, was with the plot. Some of the most memorable episodes, both good and bad, were from the original series. The Alternative Factor, for example, has to be just about the worst episode ever done in any series of all time. The Next Generation was undoubtedly the most polished of the series. Jean Luc Piccard was what I picture a starship captain would be, and the bridge of the Enterprise looked like I'd expect a 23rd-century bridge to look. Voyager took the cake for special effects - dozens of Borg cubes in one scene - nothing could beat that. Time will tell with the new series. I have an autographed photo of Brent Spiner as Data, but an autograph of Gene Roddenberry himself - wow!

Interesting… I wasn't aware of that. From now on I'll make an effort to avoid sentences comprised of incorrect words. Only the best words will compose my sentences.

Halloween is one week from today, and I have a new story to post on the very day. What happens when a thirteen-year-old New Yorker who's stuck at home giving out candy on Halloween, opens the door to find another lonely boy on the other side? Even better, the boys are both Star Trek fans. Time for a little Trek or Treat. Then come back the following week for the start of a three-part novella in which Seth and Asher decide that, since their parents are too busy to prepare a traditional Thanksgiving dinner, they'll prepare one for themselves. Throw in a friendly bet on whether or not they can tell the difference between vinyl and digital music, and several 'friends' who manage to invite themselves to their quiet, traditional meal for two, and you have the makings of a memorable Thanksgiving Dinner. What could possibly go wrong?

Wait a minute! I thought Coming Attractions were supposed to be closed to discussion. Not about date formats, who's coming, and when!

You should have known better. There is no such thing as "just one chapter" when it comes to Alan Dwight's writing.

You should have known better. There is no such thing as "just one chapter" when it comes to Alan Dwight's writing.

My Incredible Summer is another Cole Parker masterpiece that illustrates just how inadequate the rest of us are as authors. We all tend to alter the use of language to fit out characters, simplifying it for kids, altering it for the uneducated or those born elsewhere, but how many of us can so dramatically change language usage over the course of a story so effectively to reflect the evolution of the main character. I've made allowances for changes in language over the course of a character's lifetime, but I've never changed it so completely to represent a character's evolution over just a few months. The story starts out with Jody as an unfocused young teenager with nothing much to do during the summer vacation before his last year in middle school. His language is tangential, he flits from one thought to another aimlessly, changing the topic several times before getting back to telling the original story he set out to tell. There is no real substance to his speech. In short, Cole created a character who was so annoying as to make me seriously wonder whether or not I wanted to continue reading. But this was Cole's story and I knew I'd be rewarded if I just stuck to it, and I did. The transformation in Jody over the course of the story is remarkable, as he evolves from a timid, self-absorbed, apathetic young teen to a confident, self-assured, out and proud young man in love with a guy who complements him well. The change in Jody is gradual, yet remarkable. The entire tone of his language, his demeanor and his use of words changes completely. Incredible.

Pick of the Bunch by Ivor Slipper is a beautifully written story, but you'll need a full box of tissues for it. Definitely more than a few tears shed at the end.

Heavens, I wouldn't expect Colin to make every story a fable. What he writes and how he writes it is up to him. I do love to play devil's advocate, however, and can be quite a devil myself. On the one had there is teenage behavior, which Colin captured so well with this story, but on the other hand is the reaction of the reader, and that can have unintended consequences. I'm not faulting Colin for writing a very entertaining story. However, some younger readers, particularly at CW, might come away thinking how cool it was that the boys got away with it and became boyfriends too. I don't think anyone would come away thinking that it's OK to play with a gun, but a lot of the younger readers wouldn't know why the gun went off. I do have a bias here, having taken care of many gunshot victims during my career. I've helped kids paralyzed by a bullet to cope with life in a wheelchair. I've seen kids die. Saving even one kid that fate would be well worth adding a paragraph or two to the story. I'll never forget the time that Mike censored a story I wrote that contained a detailed account of a kid slashing his wrists. He didn't succeed by the way, but his attitude was detached and his account of the whole thing was rather clinical. I wrote the episode the way I thought the protagonist would have written it, but it was a virtual how to account on slashing one's wrists and in very poor taste. When Mike called me on it, I changed it immediately. I really do hope that Colon writes a follow-up story. It's not that A Hole in My Ceiling needs a moral per se, but the consequences of trying to cover up what happened could be very entertaining in and of themselves. I'd also love to see blame placed squarely where it belongs, with the father who unwittingly gave his son a loaded gun.

I do hope you'll write that sequel, Colin. Although I have never shot a gun in my life and am no fan of the second amendment, I am well aware of the fact that kids who are raised with guns are much more likely to show them proper respect. I'll never forget an episode of the 1960's era TV program, Candid Camera, in which young kids were filmed as they discovered an unloaded handgun. Without fail, all of the kids picked up the gun and played around with it as if it were a toy. The only exception was a kid who'd been taught how to use a gun for target practice. That kid, who looked to be about 8 or 9, actually told the kid who was with him to leave the gun alone, as it might be loaded and someone could get hurt. I would hope that in this age of ubiquitous guns in the U.S., along with teaching active shooter drills in all our schools, that we also teach kids to respect guns and to never handle them except under the supervision of an adult. Obviously, if these young teens received that kind of training, though, they didn't learn from it. Of course teenagers in general think they're immortal. I applaud you for writing the story in such a way that you captured young teens and their behavior perfectly. I think the sequel would be invaluable in reminding teens that acting responsibly takes priority over covering up their mistakes, particularly when a parent fails in their responsibilities as happened in this case. Oh, and Cole, I hope you realize that I wasn't being critical of Colon's story, which was very well written, but was expressing my concern that the young readership of CW might get the wrong idea from it. Not than I expect a 12-year-old to get the idea that they could get a boyfriend by showing them a loaded gun, but kids learn a lot from what they read. One of the most important lessons anyone can learn is that sometimes the consequences of not being caught are much worse than from accepting responsibility in the first place. This would have been a perfect story to illustrate the point in a way that kids would understand it, which is why I hope Colin will write a sequel.

A Hole in my Ceiling by Colin Kelly is a rather troubling story that raises some exceptionally important issues. It appears both on AD and at CW, where it is expected to reach a younger audience. Although the story is a very realistic look at how a couple of young teens deal with the accidental discharge of a gun, it sidesteps some very important issues. I am not myself a gun owner and I'm not particularly fond of guns. In my career I've helped a number of boys and young men put their lives back together after they were shot up as a result of gang violence. Some of them were themselves gang members, but a lot of them were unlucky enough to get caught in the crossfire. Although Hole in my Ceiling has a happy ending, it's actually quite likely that the boys will be caught. Just as a drill going through a piece of wood tends to splinter the wood where it exits, exit wounds from a bullet are always bigger than entry wounds. A target pistol may not be very powerful, but it can still kill. The bullet from such a weapon has a low velocity and by the time it exits a rooftop, chances are it would tear away a chunk of the shingle rather than cleanly going through it. There's also a bullet out there somewhere, probably in their yard, and it could still kill someone if hit by a lawnmower blade. Clearly, the best thing for the boys would be for them to fess up, but they're teenagers and they probably won't say anything until a roofer tells the parents that the chunk of missing shingle was caused by a gunshot from underneath. Personally, I think this story was a missed opportunity. It actually minimized the outcome from mishandling what turned out to be a loaded weapon. This was a perfect teaching moment, particularly for the audience at CW. The boys should have had to face the music, and Rafe's father should have had to come to terms with the tragedy he very nearly caused. No child should ever be given a gun or even handed a gun unless they've had thorough training in gun safety. Every gun must be considered to be loaded, even if the clip's been removed. Every gun must be considered to have a bullet chambered. A gun should never be treated as a toy - it's a lethal weapon. Children - even teens - should be supervised by adults whenever using firearms. Colin, this is a nice story with a couple of teens who act like typical teens. It has a happy ending, but it could have just as easily been a tragedy. Unfortunately, I think a lot of your younger readers a probably scratching their heads, wondering how a gun with no bullets could have gone off. I hope you'll consider writing a sequel that deals with these issues.

Summer Job is the continuation of the story of Jay and Jeff from February Surprise. You might remember that Jay gave Jeff an anonymous card for Valentine's Day, and then invited Jeff to a dance, but Jeff ended up at the wrong dance. So now it's the summer and they're out and proud boyfriends, but now that Jay's fourteen, he's expected to help out in his family's Chinese restaurant, which has been in the family for four generations. Jeff doesn't need the money, but what else is he going to do while his boyfriend's at work? So the two of them will face the challenges of a summer job together. Other than a critical staffing shortage, having to wait on friends, a salmonella outbreak, buying out the restaurant next door and, most importantly, the challenge of learning to love, it's just another summer in the life of a couple of teens.

Now that it's complete, I can say that it's a great story with excellent character development. It was just a tough read as a serial. Some stories lend themselves well to serialization. This one might have been better posted as a complete novella. I think we all write a bit differently when we know our stories will be posted serially over a period of time. That said, some of the greatest novels of all time were published initially in serial format. In many ways, it's a shame that serial publications lost their popularity when I was still in diapers. Magazines like The Atlantic and Harpers Weekly were a great way to get quality literature to the masses while providing support to up-and-coming authors. But I digress… Book chapters have always served as a means of switching story lines and providing the reader with convenient stopping points. Of course a lot of us use end-of-chapter cliff-hangers to build suspense, which leads to the term page turner. What I'm getting at is that at AD and on other story sites, there is a strong incentive to post stories serially. Some outstanding stories have been published as complete novels - Alan Dwight's stories, for example - but the attention given to them is much less than that afforded serial stories. Cole's latest story reminds us that some stories are better told as a complete tale - that at times, perhaps most of the time - it's better to write without regard to breaking a story up into serial postings. A while back we discussed ways to improve the home page to make it more modern and functional. Perhaps it's time to revisit the topic in the Green Room and actually do something about it this time. At the least, complete stories should have equal billing with serial updates, much as is done on the Dabeagle home page. Great story, Cole. Well worth reading in the end.