Richard Norway

I'm only one individual that wants to be able to live the rest of my life with the one that I love, and because he happens to be male, I am now linked to the sensationalism of what is happening in the Vatican. The negativism and outrage that is seen by the public over their horror of what is happening in the Catholic Church is undoubtedly transferred to every gay man and couple. Of course it's not the same. This is the Church after all and one would assume that they are to be held (by dogma at least) to a higher standard, But let's face it folks, the disgust over what is happening to the church is continuing to be looked on as what all gay men do.

There's more going on than has been reported. Benedict XVI has been centralizing control over the church for some time now, and the local parishes don't like to give up the autonomy that they once had. This is not a religious conflict within the church, but an administrative one. I think he feels that he has accomplished what he had set out to do. Instead of retaining control, I understand that he wants to retire to a monastery and write.

I think Dude will go out and buy the game, now that there's a cat in it for him to play with.

Here's one of my favorites,

I thought that the older audience might enjoy this, but their musical talent lives on. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zO4u-N_VGJY

As many of you know, I am a foster parent. David and I have taken in kids that need help and try to make a difference in their lives. Below is a blog entry, Julian I, that I had made on AD back in June of last year. This is to help you know about Julian, a troubled kid. Following that is my blog entry as of today, Julian II. Julian I (June 6, 2012) I've always tried to keep you all up to date with what is happening with our foster boys, but Julian has been difficult so I have held off until I could try to put it all together. He came to us on Halloween morning at around 10:30 am. Julian was removed from our home this morning. I guess that needs some explanation. Julian is 15 years old now and this is the 23rd home that he has been in since he was 2 years old. He has no concept of what family is all about. We tried to show him that, but he never connected...until lately. I don't feel that I should go into his behaviors, but I will say that the sheriff has been involved numerous times. What I do see is a kid that needs guidance, but at his age, he's reluctant. Hell, in his mind, every adult in his life has abandoned him, so it's been a struggle. It was the state's decision to remove him because they felt that he needed a higher level of care. He tried to commit suicide a few weeks ago. Don't try to tell me that that wasn't traumatic on David and I. We've gotten to love this kid. I took him to a psychiatrist after that incident, and the psychiatrists recommendation was also for a higher level of care. He is depressed. My partner, David, has been taking meds for depression for years and is well aware of the symptoms. But Julian refuses to take any meds because his appointed attorney has told him that as he's over 14, he can refuse..which he does. We saw an opening in Julian that his case worker and probation office never saw. They assumed that he was a bad kid and treated him as such. We saw something different. Their approach was to give him consequences for his behavior...only. They wanted to see outcome from Julian based on fear. We believe in a nurturing approach where the out come is based on not fear of doing something wrong but to instill in him that the outcome is what he wants to do, not out of fear. We saw a breaking of his shell over the last month or so. He cried for the first time in front of me this morning when he realized that he had to leave. I fear for him now. The group home or shelter home that he's going to now will destroy everything that David and I have built over the last 7 months. They're going to dictate his schedule without giving him the chance to be a kid and learn how to dictate himself. I must agree, however, that he needs a higher level of care. We'd take him back when he's released. Julian II (January 13, 2013) I learned at young age that life can have some twists that you don’t foresee. From my last blog entry in June 2012, you learned that our foster boy, Julian, was taken from our home because his behaviors required a higher level of care that wasn’t available in a regular foster home setting. He was put in a group home with other delinquent boys, I have sense learned that the term “delinquent” is a legal definition assigned by the courts to describe a boy’s behavior. Julian could not follow their rules either and wanted to get out of that house as soon as he could. Because of that he was transferred to the county juvenile detention center and spent the next month or so in Jail. He was given an option to return to the group home, but refused rather to spend his time in jail. He was eventually transferred to an adolescent residential treatment facility for boys in Albuquerque, where he has been for the past 6 months. What a kid, huh? Trust and respect are very conditional qualities. They need to be earned, and he has earned neither from David nor I. But love is unconditional. It’s not earned; it’s just given. David and I love this kid and grieve for his future. I told his therapist and Julian that we would take him back if his behaviors changed for the better, his outlook for his future started looking upward, he was making strides to accomplish what he wanted to do with his life, and that he would start to love himself. Since my first conversation with his therapist in Albuquerque, we’ve continued to talk almost on a weekly basis. She lets me know how he’s doing, but more importantly to gather background information as to my thoughts on why he has been acting the way he has. She initially wanted to keep him there until possibly May of 2013, but on December 1st she informed me that he has changed so much that she wants to release him before Christmas. Now, I don’t believe that people can fundamentally change. They are so engrained with their past experiences that fundamental changes are not possible. Oh, they may change their outward actions and make you think that they have changed, but it’s really accepting the way of normal action whether they believe them or not. Getting used to acting out normally over a long period of time will eventually become part of who they are strictly by reputation and then become a part of their past experiences. Okay, David and I had doubts. We had only heard his therapist telling us over the phone how he has changed. I said I believe her, but I needed to see it for myself (and I’m NOT from Missouri). He turned 16 on November 23, 2012, and David, Ray (our other foster boy (10 years old)) and I drove up to Albuquerque and took him to lunch for a birthday present. But more importantly, I wanted to see him and how he had changed. OMG. I think they killed off the old Julian and replaced him with someone else, even though he looked like the old Julian. We saw a kid that for the first time was able to interact with us and be a part of the conversation. Ray has looked up to him as a big brother, and he engaged Ray in conversation as if they were actual siblings. He talked about his plans for his future, something that he never thought he had before…a future. Many other clues as to his this change would be novel length, but to say that I was completely surprised is an understatement. We had Julian here in Las Cruces for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. Again it was another surprise. Last year at Christmas, he dished up his plate for dinner and then went to his room to eat…alone. This year he was a part of our family. Julian came down to be with us this weekend on another pass from where he was living. We had made the decision that we would take him back. It was also heartwarming to hear from his therapist that Julian idolized us and would go to no other home. Julian has changed, but his change is not in his behaviors. His change is in an increased sense of self-worth which then changes his behaviors. He was now starting to believe that he meant something to this world. Don’t get me wrong though. He’s still 16 years old with all of the uncertainties of growing up, but he is now approaching the more normal level of fear of uncertainties. Julian will transition back to our home on January 26th, and we feel that we have our son back. Those of you that are parents will know how David and I feel right now. We can all make a difference in the lives of young people that will lead this country into further greatness, but much more importantly, lead young people into the greatness that is their destiny.

GW, I think there are a lot of writers here at AD that write for that exact reason, I know I do. I've talked to many of the kids in our GLBTQ Center youth group, and I hear their stories. But, I know that there a lot of kids out there that don't know what it can be to be themselves. It's not just the kids though. It's also their parents and the hetro society too that need to understand. I write for a second reason though. I was an engineer before I retired, and engineering did not afford me a release of my creative side. So, I took up writing for that release. My genre of choice is closely tied to my passions. I have received many emails regarding my meager givings, and some were in tears. Rest assured Gee, that we are making a difference.

I read At Swim, Two Boys 10 years ago just after it was published. All I can say is that it shocked me. This book was published in 2002, but it was James Joice's prose on paper long after he was gone. It is his poetic words throughout. What shocked me, and why I initially put it down, was the very difficult time that I had in understanding the Irish vernacular, the Irish history weaved throughout. But I picked it back up again last year, and I'm glad i did because it totally enveloped me in O'Neill's world. I have never read a novel before that so made me love and hate, and love again O'Neill's characters before with such passion. This is not a novel for the light heart-ed, It is truly magnificent, and I wonder why it is not on the New York Times best seller list. I guess that has to do with the fact that it has 3 gay protagonists. I cannot recommend this novel enough to be read by every author and reader here, or for that matter by everyone on the planet. Amizon has 122 reviews of the book with an average of 4.5 out of 5.0 reviews. Richard

Engrossing. I couldn't put it down. What a wonderful story, my pet owning friend. And claws are acceptable, as it fits, :).

Damn Capitalist!

Did you guys and gals know that Colin is a died in the wool romantic? Richard

When you get to the end of the video that Bruin posted, take a look at the suggestions for further viewing. Michael Moore has it right! Richard

HA! I sent Raymond next door to play with the neighbor's kid for the day. The neighbor kid's mom was actually pleased because it kept Chris (the neighbor's kid) out of her hair too. Richard

Chris, thank you for sharing that article. Here in New Mexico, gay men and women are allowed to foster and adopt children, much to the dismay of other states. When David and I moved here 8-1/2 years ago, we found a state that was very gay friendly, but with a mostly closeted gay population. That's one of the major reasons that he and I opened the first gay and lesbian community center in the state. I have a daughter, but David has no children, and we decided to look into the possibility of fostering a boy that needed a family, We found many! I must say that it's one of the most emotional and heart felt experiences you can have when your foster boy calls you dad for the first time. We also took in a 15 year old boy a year ago. We grew to care about him, but his issues with a mother that doesn't want him, his lack of, or understanding of what family is all about, and his need to be accepted drove him to make many wrong choices. We are the 23rd home he has been in since he was 2 years old. He was eventually removed from our home for a higher level of care. He was placed in a group home, but could not follow their rules. Eventually he was incarcerated in County Juvenal Detention and then transferred to a rehab center in Albuquerque. He has always wanted to come back here to live with us, but I told him that the only way he could make that move was when his behaviors were under control, when his motivations were stable, and his outlook on his life became positive. He's been there for a few months now, and I talk to his therapist on a weekly basis. She is ecstatic about how he has turned his life around. I don't have to relay the details, but only to mention that he was given an award as the most outstanding resident of the month for October. His 16th birthday is this Friday (the day after Thanksgiving), and David and I are going to drive up to Albuquerque (we live in Las Cruces) on Saturday to take him out to lunch. I believe that this kid has turned himself around. Maybe he needed the strict rules and support that he has gotten there. We'll take him back, because we care about him, and maybe we can show him how a family functions to support each other. He wrote me a letter last week. It was the most tearful thing that I have read in years where he told me how David and I have opened his eyes to what a future he can have...and that he loved us. Richard

I have a new story brewing in my mind and it's scaring me...a lot. It's been on my mind for months, and I keep finding reasons why the story works. I listen to SPA on satellite radio (especially Bruce Mitchell) a lot, and the music has directed me to precisely the emotions that I want to express in this story. I'm not scared about the story as it needs to be told, but I'm scared about my abilities to write it the way it needs to be told. I'm sure that all of you have had self doubts about your abilities, as it's human nature to self doubt. But... I guess I'm feeling a sort of calling to write this story...my second novel. I have two novels under development that will be put aside for this one. This story will be emotional...and uplifting. I'm reminded of a line from a film called Finding Forester when Sean Connery told his young student when asked what he's doing, he responded with, I'm writing. I need to just write.

I too started reading on Nifty. I even posted my first story there, but it's not there anymore. I know it was there at one time, because I got a lot of comments on it. One guy wrote to tell me that he loved my story, but it was the first time that he had read anything on Nifty that had no sex in it. LOL Maybe that's the reason my story's not there anymore. It had no sex. But you're right. Nifty is a great resource. Most of you started out there, and Nifty spurred your creative minds to do something better. It was a great catalyst to motivate you to reach for that higher level. AwesomeDude and you all wouldn't be here if not for the motivation to do something better.

Fisher Publishing has a good ring to it. Now what will be your first publication from the long list of your works?

This sounds really interesting. Do we have anything like this in the US?

The price of "real" maple syrup here in the US is just ungodly. I enjoyed it as a kid growing up in Northern Minnesota, but have had to satisfy myself with Aunt Jemimas buttery stuff. Thank you Des for that recipe. I plan on making a few gallons to have on hand. Now... Where can I find some Fenugreek? I may have to order it online, as I'm in Southern New Mexico, and the only thing they think about here is green chile.

After much pressure, the White House today released the recipes for their home brew that White House Chef Sam Kass developed for President Obama. Here's the link to the recipe and a video by Sam Kass of how he made the beer. I've been making my own wine and brewing my own beer for over 35 years, and I definitely plan on trying my hand at the Honey Ale and Honey Porter.

Well, I'm 100% Norwegian (sort of Scandinavian, I guess,and a viking) but I have never pillaged a village or raped a woman. I'm sure my dad kept his rape and pillage down as he knew that his son (me) would be talking to a lot of Brits and didn't want to have me explain their desire to have blond hair. :)

I think you should all see this. It's a short film by A. J. Carter. The star is a 17 year old from South Africa, but he now claims Perth, Austrailia as his home. It was filmed in Austrailia in the wheat growing part of the country. More on this talented 17 y/o can be found at http://www.northstreetmusic.com/?p=689 I must warn you all that it is NOT a happy film, as it deals with bullying and its effects. Please watch

Oops. You're right Colin.

I'd like to suggest a movie for you all to see. Yes, I'm an emotional "bloke" (you Brit and OZ friends taught me that term), and I had a few tears from the movie. But, it's not sad, it's uplifting. It's one of those inspiring movies that say to you that "It can be done." You can find it on Netflix on their "Watch instantly" section, so you don't have to download it or order it, or God forbid that you have to pay to see it. It's called "The Perfect Pitch." I know, It"s a baseball story, and that may turn people off. But I think that the people that are on here for kids, and their well being, will understand the inspiration that this movie (story) has to say.

When you watch the video trailer of the movie, at the end, a series of related videos will appear on your screen. Please watch the one titled, "Ellen DeGeneres talks to Extremely inspiring 14 year old Graeme Taylor." This will make you cry and feel proud, and I wish that I could be as inspiring as this young man is.