Resolution Revolution

[blue]

OK, this is not a whiny, confused post from Blue. That alone should be a surprise.

This is about empowerment and reintegration, being my whole self.

My posts here and elsewhere, regarding myself and gay topics have too often been, well, a big mess, frankly. In person, I'm about the same on my (you can say it, Blue) my gayness.

My posts elsewhere on more general topics are much more together, whether they're fun or serious. They still have a certain personality, but that's one I'm proud of, the "real me," the "better me," the me I'd really like to be both here and in person.

A few of you know me from email or IM. I don't know, really, how I come across there, because sometimes I'm not at my best. Other times, or with some of you, I'm me at my best.

So what's this rather long-winded post about, then? (And you know I can be wordy.)

Simple: I am going to make a big effort to be that same, best me, the me who's positive, friendly, occasionally funny, occasionally serious, but definitely so much more of the guy that I want to be, to become, online and in person.

From time to time, you may see ol' Blue still not so sure, still searching, still kinda down or confused. -- But I am determined that you all will see more of the real, better me that some of you already know and that I am elsewhere, with my friends and family.

Oh, and I'd like to thank you all for putting up with me through all of it, and even more, for helping me out, to learn, or sometimes relearn, truths I'd forgotten or discounted or never knew. Y'all are great. -- I'd list everybody, but it'd be a long list, and I don't want to exclude anyone who's been important in that. Besides, sometimes we don't realize what was truly important until later on. So thanks.

If I've ever emailed or PMed or IMed you, and especially those friends I talk to regularly, I want to thank you particularly. No, I don't know quite what's next. This isn't heralding some big, huge change for me. ... Or maybe it is, and it's just that first step toward that.

Thanks for listening and talking. Here's to an even better time from now on, for all of us.

[carolinascribbler]

Blue,

All we can do is strive to do (and be) the best that we can. If our best doesn't meet someone else's standards, or we aren't what they believe we should be, then, that's just too bad. Just continue being yourself, striving to be the best BLUE that you can be. **hugs**

Peace,

Johnny :D

[aj]

I think, Blue, that the key to whole thing is to be the Blue that you are the happiest with...if that means the more optimistic, slightly whimsical and funny guy I know from IM, with a tremendous compassion for others searching for the way even as he himself searches, then that's a fine person to be...but it has to be the person that YOU like the best. After all, you're the person who is going to have to live with this person in the closest proximity.

cheers!

aj

[blue]

Thanks, guys. Heh, it's nice to know I'm whimsical. :)

I've set a few goals for myself. Once two or three of those are done, (goal: before Valentine's Day) I won't have as much weighing me down, and I'll have more freedom (and less excuses) to get on with my personal / social life, with all that will mean.