Cole Parker Posted May 8, 2007 Report Share Posted May 8, 2007 Harry is getting along in years and finds that he is becoming unable to perform sexually. He finally goes to his doctor, who tries a few things, but nothing seems to work. So the doctor refers him to an American Indian medicine man. The medicine man says, "I can cure this." That said, he throws a white powder in a flame, and there is a flash with billowing blue smoke. Then he says, "This is powerful medicine. You can only use it once a year. All you have to do is say '123' and your maleness shall rise for as long as you wish!" Harry then asks, "What happens when it's over, and I don't want to continue?" The medicine man replies, "All you or your partner has to say is 1234, and it will go down. But be warned -- it will not work again for another year!" Harry rushes home, eager to try out his new powers and prowess. That night he is ready to surprise John. He showers, shaves, and puts on his most exotic shaving lotion. He gets into bed, and lying next to his partner, he says, "123." He suddenly becomes more aroused than anytime in his life ... just as the medicine man had promised. John, who had been facing away, turns over and asks, "What did you say 123 for?" And that, my friends, is why you shouldn't end a sentence with a preposition. Quote Link to comment
DesDownunder Posted May 9, 2007 Report Share Posted May 9, 2007 Now that is funny! Thanks Cole. You have reminded me of another old joke, not quite as clever: An elderly man went to the doctor and asked, "Doctor I want my sex lowered." The doctor looked at him quizzically and asked, "Just how old are you?" "I'm 94," replied the man. "Look at 94, sex is all in your mind." "Yes, I know," he said to the doctor, "That's why I want it lowered." Quote Link to comment
Cole Parker Posted May 9, 2007 Author Report Share Posted May 9, 2007 Des: Yeah, I remember that one! Great joke. Thanks for the reminder. C[/size][/b][/color] Quote Link to comment
blue Posted May 11, 2007 Report Share Posted May 11, 2007 Just saw these... Much clapping, very good. Quote Link to comment
colinian Posted May 12, 2007 Report Share Posted May 12, 2007 I know this one isn't about people getting on in years like you guys (NOI), but hey, I'm only 17 and I think it's funny! There's a cartoon in the Dilbert book "Journey to Cubeville" that's totally funny: Dilbert: "Every so often, I get this vibration feeling over on my hip." Psychiatrist: "It's called phantom pager syndrome. There's no cure for it." Dilbert: "I don't want to cure it. I want to relocate it." I was in 7th or 8th grade when I saw that cartoon for the first time. I was rolling on the floor laughing so hard I couldn't catch my breath. My folks came into the family room to see what was so funny, and when I showed it to them they looked at me like I was crazy. I don't think they got it! Colin Quote Link to comment
DesDownunder Posted May 12, 2007 Report Share Posted May 12, 2007 No offence taken Colin, I think it is funny too. At our age even a cell phone looks good. I have my cell phone set to vibrate. Ahhh! Nice! Quote Link to comment
colinian Posted May 12, 2007 Report Share Posted May 12, 2007 No offence taken Colin, I think it is funny too. At our age even a cell phone looks good. I have my cell phone set to vibrate. Ahhh! Nice! At MY age a cell phone in my pocket set to vibrate is outstanding! Colin Quote Link to comment
DesDownunder Posted May 12, 2007 Report Share Posted May 12, 2007 At MY age a cell phone in my pocket set to vibrate is outstanding! Colin Okay, okay, no need to brag, I remember "outstanding" as well. Quote Link to comment
Trab Posted May 12, 2007 Report Share Posted May 12, 2007 Outstanding indeed. Makes you give everyone your cell number. And then they wonder why it takes so long to answer when they call. Quote Link to comment
colinian Posted May 13, 2007 Report Share Posted May 13, 2007 Outstanding indeed. Makes you give everyone your cell number. And then they wonder why it takes so long to answer when they call. I don't answer. I changed my voicemail message to say: "Colin's on the phone, please call back in 30 seconds." Colin Quote Link to comment
DesDownunder Posted May 13, 2007 Report Share Posted May 13, 2007 I don't answer. I changed my voicemail message to say: "Colin's on the phone, please call back in 30 seconds." Colin 30 seconds! Yes! Well, I guess that proves Colin is 17. And I suppose one could say the phrase "...on the phone..." fits in with the thread's title of "Getting on...", even if "...in years" isn't quite as long as any of us need...yet. Quote Link to comment
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