Step One

[JamesSavik]

don't taunt the varmit!

[Tanuki Racoon]

I won't bother to come down to that level.

Of course not. It just dribbles down your thighs.

:raccoon: :raccoon:

:hehe:

[Cole Parker]

That doesn't even make sense!

C

[Tanuki Racoon]

That doesn't even make sense!

No, at your age it's probably beyond your comprehension.

[Cole Parker]

Probably a good thing.

C

[JamesSavik]

Thanks WBS

A year ago I was ready to throw in the towel. You encouraged me to hang in.

Soon after, I had an idea and... I just submitted the last chapter of Twilight for posting.

[Lugnutz]

That doesn't even make sense!

C

It's not supposed to make sense. He's trying to drag you down to his level, then he'll beat you with experience.

[Tanuki Racoon]

I had an idea and..

I had an idea once. I've lost it.

[Cole Parker]

If he's using non sequitur and idiocy as his weopans, I'm in deep coon doodoo. I don't have those tools, and he has them in abundance.

C

[Camy]

If he's using non sequitur and idiocy as his weopans, I'm in deep coon doodoo. I don't have those tools, and he has them in abundance.

I thought Weopans were small furry shrew like beasties.

[Cole Parker]

I thought Weopans were small furry shrew like beasties.

No, they're small worm-like critters that have invaded my brain pan and whose purpose is to prevent me from taking the time to reread what I'd written before hitting ADD REPLY. I'm unfortunately infested with them, possibly because where they are there is plenty of empty space in which to multiply.

C

[Tanuki Racoon]

there is plenty of empty space in which to multiply.

And you said we'd never agree on anything.

[Steven Keiths]

My God, I fell asleep reading the Manifesto.

When I finally awoke, I said to myself, "Self, who gives a damn." Followed by thoughts of being--okay, happy would be streeeeeetching it--glad to see Daniel Boone's headwear back on the site.

Then I checked my footwear.

And what's with the powerballs. I thought racoons had little tiny...uh, never mind.

Hi, WBMS

[Cole Parker]

I thought racoons had little tiny...uh, never mind.

No, they don't. They frequently don't have any at all. At least the ones I've had dealings with. . . .

C

[Tanuki Racoon]

No, they don't. They frequently don't have any at all. At least the ones I've had dealings with. . . .

Comes from dealing with the wrong sort.

[TracyMN]

I can't remember where this started, but I get notifications of it so it must have been somewhere.

It does seem to be going nowhere...in a hurry, though.

Not for the faint of heart, but we knew that.

T.

[Jason Rimbaud]

And here it goes again...Wibby just won't stay gone...shit

Jason (really happy that you're back, it's been all warm fuzzy bunny slippers for way too long)

[Bruin Fisher]

Thank you Jason for bringing my attention back to this thread.

Scanning the posts I remember the poll with which his exalted raccoon-ness started it off. Haemorrhoid treatment is a delicate matter, of course, and I can certainly confirm the finding of the poll: Bruin Fur doesn't help at all. It just gets in the way. It would appear that the experience of the pollsters guides us towards a close run win for Orangutan fur. Can anyone help out here? What do you do with it, assuming that you can get hold of some?

[DesDownunder]

Ever since the results of this poll became evident, I have awoken in the mornings with less hair than I had when I went to sleep.

It seems like someone is waiting until I fall asleep and then cutting off some of my hair, packaging it in plastic containers marked

"Haemorrhoid removing hair.

-Genuine organic orangutan Product.

made in Australia"

I don't even think they are washing it before selling it.

I am nearly bald now, have pity, leave me with some hair.

[Bruin Fisher]

I'll have to check the shelves at my local pharmacy. Perhaps they include an instruction leaflet. I wonder what you have to do with it - burn it and sniff the fumes? Dissolve it in whisky and drink it? Wrap it up in a dock leaf and stick it up your.....

...nose?

Very sorry about the moth-eaten effect caused by the depradatation of your fur, poor Des. But you are serving the greater good. It should give you warm feeling inside, to counteract the chilly feeling outside now you're denuded.

[DesDownunder]

I'll have to check the shelves at my local pharmacy. Perhaps they include an instruction leaflet. I wonder what you have to do with it - burn it and sniff the fumes? Dissolve it in whisky and drink it? Wrap it up in a dock leaf and stick it up your.....

...nose?

Very sorry about the moth-eaten effect caused by the depradatation of your fur, poor Des. But you are serving the greater good. It should give you warm feeling inside, to counteract the chilly feeling outside now you're denuded.

I have an orangutan applicator, but only one, and I would be gravely upset to wake up and find that missing.

That's me, always serving the greater goodies.

[Bruin Fisher]

Well, may I borrow it - and can you guarantee it will cure my piles?

[DesDownunder]

Guarantee, you want a guarantee? I guarantee you will have bigger things to worry about.

[Bruin Fisher]

So it's not very big, then? Well, you know what they say, it's how you use it that counts.

[Tanuki Racoon]

I can't remember where this started, but I get notifications of it so it must have been somewhere.

It does seem to be going nowhere...in a hurry, though.

Going nowhere in a hurry much like my life.