Trousers (US translation: pants)

[Bruin Fisher]

Your mum always said it ain't right

To wear trousers so terribly tight

I can see at a glance

What you've got in your pants

And in light of the sight - I just might!

[DesDownunder]

Thanks Bruin, that was a limerick with a bulge.

[Bruin Fisher]

Thanks for your response, Des, for a couple of days my limerick got no responses, and I was getting worried that I'd transgressed a line.

In the great tradition, Limericks are meant to be rude, even scurrilous, and this one certainly is that. I thought it possible that it was too rude for the sensibilities of the Awesomedude readership, and that it was being studiously ignored as a way of tactfully telling me I'd gone beyond the pale.

Hugs to a fellow Limerick afficionado!

Bruin

[Chris James]

Why am I just seeing this now? You forgot to raise the flags, Bruin.

A delightful limerick about...pants. That's what we call them here, probably because so many of us can't spell trousers. I mourn the language, and the inception of baggy saggy pants. Give me a tight pair of trousers to look at (not to wear). It used to be that you could tell a guy's religion if the trousers were tight enough.

[Cole Parker]

I was getting worried that I'd transgressed a line, that it was too rude for the sensibilities of the Awesomedude readership, and that I'd gone beyond the pale.

Bruin

The AD readership has sensibilities? Why didn't anyone tell me that before?

C

[Cole Parker]

OK, Bruin, to show I can have the same lack of propriety that you do and so you won't feel like you're out there hanging by yourself, AND, because I hate to pass up the opportunity to write a bad limerick, here goes:

Bruin:

Your mum always said it ain't right

To wear trousers so terribly tight

I can see at a glance

What you've got in your pants

And in light of the sight - I just might!

Cole:

Now my mum, not prudish or dear

Made her position most clear:

"Why, 'tis a marvelous sight

Seein' you in trousers so tight

But kids you'll not have, I do fear!"

[DesDownunder]

Cole:

My Grandmother had the same fright,

That I'd have no kids with pants so tight,

But the real cause was my sex genes,

Making me protrude in my blue-jeans,

Whenever I saw, Mr. Right.

Bruin, don't worry about no one commenting on your splendiferous writings. It often takes a while for people to learn to read, let alone write a reply.

[Merkin]

Never one to pass up an opportunity to hang out with the bad boys, here's my contribution:

"My pants were too tight," said the vicar,

"And my ungodly bulge earned a snicker;

Now I wear just a cassock

For the freedom's fantastic

And I swear I've grown longer and thicker!"

[DesDownunder]

Merkin, The images you limerick has put into my mind are less than Holy. Thanks for the snicker with the vicar. I did wonder what you were going to use to rhyme with cassock...you had a couple of choices which you wisely avoided.

[dude]

Merkin’s tight pants should not concern vicars,

Or subject him to giggles and snickers.

It’s that choir boy so slight,

With skin soft and white,

Who prompts him to leak in his knickers

[Cole Parker]

Oh, my!

C

[Cole Parker]

OK, one more and I'm going to bed:

A vicar most properly sententious,

Had choir boys with thoughts quite licentious

He caught them at play

All giggling and gay

And laughing at lessons abstentious

C

[colinian]

I think Cole has it nailed.

Colin

[DesDownunder]

To bed with the lot of you,

With no fun after curfew,

Rather than be thanked

You all need to spanked

But you'd probably enjoy that, too.

[Merkin]

Wonderful, the lot of you.

Snicker.

J

[Bruin Fisher]

Thank you, boys, for coming out to play - and relieving my paranoia...

Like Des, I find my imagination running wild over James' contribution. So...

If your pants let your stiffy show through,

Tie it down with some string! (Don't use glue).

For a man in a kilt

Whose erection won't wilt

A good heavy sporran should do.

[Cole Parker]

I love it, Bruin, that you're writing that based on an idea by Merkin. The irony is rich.

C

[Bruin Fisher]