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colinian

"That Feeling " by furnishedsoul on GA

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I'm reading a story on Gay Authors, That Feeling by furnishedsoul. It's written in first person. The author uses internal narrative to put the reader into the head of Caleb, the protagonist, so we know what he's thinking. Caleb is gay, is in the closet, is on the football team, has a girlfriend, is utterly miserable, and is unhappy with his life and trying to hide who he is and hating that he has to do that. He thinks like a conflicted teen and lets us listen to his thoughts. For example:

"I was already dead when I met Knox. Okay, so not literally dead. I was still alive enough to go to school and eat and breath and do crap like that, but I didn’t feel alive. I don’t know why I’m talking like anything’s changed...I am still dead, really."

"I at least have friends and a girlfriend and a real life. That’s a lie and I know it, but I still like to tell myself that."

"I’m at school right now. High school. High school in America. Specifically the 11th Grade at Greenbrier High School in freaking Georgia. Yeah, Georgia. I think this is half my problem. Not that anything in Georgia is really bad or anything, but for some reason it just grates me the wrong way. Everything grates me the wrong way. But apparently this is an angsty teenage problem because everyone talks about it like it’s just the way it is and that gets on my nerves because everyone else seems so fine while I constantly feel like shit and it feels like there is nothing I can do about it."

"Smart people know how to do life. I just sit and watch life do me."

There are twenty chapters posted so far. I'm hooked. Highly recommended.

Colin :icon_geek:

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