What a difference just a few weeks can make had you told that I'd be where I am now I wouldn't have believed you. For those of you who've read my Blog Fear know that me getting up there and singing Stand by Me at the local gay bar in Pontiac,Mi was a life changing event, but how much I had no idea. See following that night ever since things have just kinda fell into place. For starters I'm currently in the process of getting rid of the breathing tube I've had since I was 6. basically the first chapter of The Phoenix Diaries was autobiographical( sans the dream sequence). Anyways like after I got back from liberty bar (on n Saginaw St if any of you guys are in the north Oakland county area of Michigan). And like I just felt literally on fire. So the next day I decided to try capping off the tube(blocking off the opening so I'm forced to breath through my nose and mouth).
Anyways at first I was kind of difficult and I only lasted about an hour, but I kept at everyday and now it's been almost two weeks that I've been breathing without the tube. And you know what it feels nice and kind of weird(using a whole lot of muscles I have used in ages) . So while this was going on I also discovered I could actually talk and not the clicking type thing I used to do, but real vocalizations and everything :D. so I've already been to my doctor's and ENT(eyes,ears, nose and throat) and am in the process of scheduling reconstructive surgery to reverse it. With any lucky I'll be free of this thing after almost 20 years. So yeah I'm loving being me right now and have noticed the effect it had on me.
Like before when I wrote it was always this chore because I didn't think what I wrote was good enough, right? So I was in Ferndale, one of the major LGBT hot spots in Michigan, for an appointment with the optometrist so I could get my license reinstated(had one too many points on it and it got suspended). So afterward I'm walking around just exploring a bit and come to this used book and decide to get a few on writing and the one book in particular that has really helped to get in touch with my inner writer is If You Want To Write by Brenda Ueland. It's like she so gets what it's like to be a new writer and I've taken her advice to write for the sake of your own enjoyment to heart. and because of this book and the changes I've kinda been through lately I decided to write an autobiography and have been hella busy lining up interviews with my old doctors, nurses, teachers, etc and in the process I'm finding out about myself you know. Because of the impact that writing has had on me recently I decided to alter my degree so I can combine my love of physics with creative writing and then go to graduate school and become a physics teacher on either the middle school or high school level. Well a big thanks to all you guys who have given me warm words of welcome and criticism where need be (mark ).