Deanbn1990
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Posts posted by Deanbn1990
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BLOT on the LANDSCAPE
People say I'm lucky where I reside
Rolling hills and ancient tress frame my view.
Cows sleepily make milk in grasslands wide,
Spider webs glint with jewels of morning dew.
Air clean, no noise of cars, pollution free;
Swift silver streams diamond studded dancing.
A rolling vista, multi-hued I see
Sparse spread cosy homes the scene enhance.
I love this land, as boy I roamed it free
On foot, by bike, adventures in my mind.
To swim a river, climb a massive tree;
To fight and vanquish demons of all kinds.
But now in vain I look for solace there.
I look for secret places where I can hide.
In circles wander; try to loose my care,
But this demon I can't fight, it's inside.
In countryside so peaceful, I know well,
I walk for miles, never loose my way.
But all the time I take my living hell
That growing cancer telling me I'M GAY!
No lepers bell, but hatred all the same,
Afraid to say; afraid to live a lie.
Those secret places where I played a game
Now serve again, this time a place to die.
Where is the boy who laughed and dragons slew,
Who loved his life, met hope with open arms?
Now hated himself, fears living if they knew
A dirty secret replaced a boyish charm.
Not normal, pervert, shouldn't be allowed
A place in hell reserved for those who dare.
On Earth alone, yes even in a crowd
Perhaps it's time he took his place down there.
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THE SAME
There's a voice that's screaming inside me
"Why can't I be the same?"
Like the rest of my generation
Fit into the teenage frame.
They hate me because we're wealthy
The money is not mine.
I don't want the things they buy me.
I just want a bit of their time.
I can't help finding learning so easy
Why am I hated for that?
Why resent me cause I am clever?
It's like hating a guy 'cos he's fat.
I don't like the music you rave to
But I don't make fun of you.
I listen to classic for pleasure
Why does that so upset you?
My sexual feelings confuse me
I don't feel I'm part of the norm
But who can I talk to about it?
Admitting would cause such a storm.
You think that my life is so perfect
Big house and money to spare.
If only you knew what the truth was,
But I doubt that you'd really care.
I hate it that I am so different
I don't like the person I am.
So why do I just go on living,
Yes living a life that's a sham.
You hate me because I am different
But if I do you a fave;
Remove this wart from your presence
Would you come and visit my grave?
I doubt it; I'd still be neglected
A stone carved out with my name.
Like so many else in our churchyard
Unloved, but at last I'm the same.
Its Not Wrong
in Poets' Corner
Posted
IT'S NOT WRONG
Why do they say our love is wrong
Because you're twice my age and more?
The more the world condemns us both
The more I know our love is pure
What can I give, I have but youth
To pay you back for what you give.
Your wisdom, care and concern:
Encouragement to make me live.
I steal your wisdom for my own
I pick your knowledge as I need.
You help me grow and to mature
My seeking heart you help to feed.
Our tender moments oh too brief
A special time two bodies share.
A man and boy the world condemns
They cannot know, I do not care.
I know that what we have is good
Your age can bring what youth can't have.
The world may say that we are doomed
But I'll love you so long I live.