I hope that you all are doing well this week. I am so glad that it's summer vacation and no more school! Peter (Tara's younger brother) flew here from Chicago for our graduation. It was a surprise for Tara. Tara didn't know that Peter flew on our graduation day. When she first saw him, she yelled, "OMG, PETER, YOU ARE HERE!" and hugged him too tightly. Peter said, "Tara...you are squeezing me too tightly that I can't breath...so let me go!" Peter is such a cool dude. lol. If you want to know why Peter was in Chicago, then it's kinda long story. Tara and her family moved to NY from Chicago a couple of years ago, and Peter was having a difficult time to adjust his new life here. Peter was really unhappy and homesick for Chicago, his relatives and his friends. Awhile later after they first moved here, it was decided that Peter should moved back to Chicago to stay with his uncle and relatives. He is more happy in Chicago than here, so he decided to stay in Chicago for school. Let me tell you, it makes me happy that he is happy in Chicago because I know that it is better for him to be there. Peter still comes to NY for summer, sometimes for Christmas break, and mostly mid-winter break and spring break. He is staying here for the summer until end of August when he has to go back to school. I hang out with him most of the time over the summer. Again, he's a cool dude. lol. Tara has another brother...An older brother, Eric. He went to the college in Chicago. Tara will go to the same college that Eric went to. Mind you, Tara is pretty excited to go to live in Chicago again for college. She'll come to NY for college breaks and summer vacations.
I am still having a difficult time with Saul's death, even though I'll always think of the memories we have made past few years. After Saul's death, I had dreams that invloves Saul sometimes. It really made me happy that I can see him in my dream. Let me tell you one of my dreams, which is really comforting to me. In my dream, I was sitting on the bench, feeling sad. Out of nowhere, Saul was there. He came up to me and said, "Mike, please don't feel sad, just smile. Your smile always brightens everyone's day. I love you." Then, he left. Saul was very smart what are the right things to say to people without insulting them. I still missed him, more than before. It was no fun and lonely to spend my first summer without Saul, even though I have other friends to hang out with. But, to be honest, out of my friends, Saul was the most fun person to chill with. I remember, few months before he passed away, we made a plan to go to Six Flags over the summer, since we were going to different college. Now, this plan is gone...just gone, like it never existed. Some people keep saying to me that I should go to Six Flags with someone else, and I don't know if this is a good idea or not. But, I do really think that Saul really wanted me to have aome friends to go with to Six Flags. I know that he doesn't want me to blow off this plan. I am not ready to do that, but one day, I will. Saul was really looking foward to graduation and college, and he never got a chance to graduate or go off to college. He was so excited to find out that he got accepted into one of the colleges he really wanted to go, and it's gone. His spot for this college is gone, and now it belongs to someone ( I'M F---ING NOT READY TO ACCEPT THAT SAUL'S SPOT NOW BELONGS TO SOMEONE ELSE!). Why did he have to die? I have no answers...I think Saul knows the answer, since he is with God now. Also, God knows the answer and I believe that He knows what's for the best. I am comforted knowing that Saul is in so much better place and he is not suffering. I am comforted that he is with all deceased family members and Quintin. Saul, I know that I've said this a million time, but I missed you very much. I'll bet that you are proud that I graduated with a proud feeling. I know that you love my speech. Well, I am not saying good bye to you right now because I know for sure that I will see you again later on. I love you and please keep watching over me. So, see you later.
Ok, I don't really care if you think that I shouldn't said some stuff in the last paragraph that may make you feel depressed. It's my choice since this is my blog. I have the right to express my feelings about Saul's death here. If you don't want to hear it, then please don't read it from now on.
Tara and I are doing great. She's a really amazing girl I ever know. I love her a lot and we had a lot of fun on our date last night. Tomorrow, I am going to hang out with Tara and Peter at her house. Even though we will go to different colleges, I will still be near her. Our love is much stronger than before. I am happy to see how well our relationship goes.
Ok, I'm done for now. So, laters!