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April is coming up soon...


rauch4322

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Hey y'all,

College life is going good. Meet a lot of new weird random people but hell, they are fun. My spring break (in first week of March) went well. Just relax at home and chill with some few friends who were home for spring break at same time as I was. How are you all? How are your lives doing? How's your relationship going?

Well...my next topic is the hardest thing to talk about...April is coming up next week...That means April 11th marked the first year since car accident and two deaths. April 21st marked the second year to celebrate Saul's birthday without him... It is so hard right now...Much harder because I still can't believe that he's gone. I know that he's not gone, since he is just right there. But, I meant...he's gone physically...No more high fives, no more punchings (jokingly) and stuff like that. I won't able to hear his laugh, his voice and his "HEYY MIKE!" again... I remember, on the day of his funeral, I was really expecting it all to be a joke...A really bad, horrible joke, like I expected Saul to get up from his coffin said said, "gotcha y'all...I'm not dead!" Quintin's parents are still taking it harder since they lost two sons already. They had four kids...and all they have now is two daughters. I just still can't believe that they both are gone...robbed out of their lives. It's like that they were being cheated by death. I'll never forget that day that I heard the deaths. It was like it was yesterday when I was being told by my friend that Saul and Quintin were dead and after I heard this new, I threw up. I felt so sick when I still remember that day. :icon11: It is so painful, knowing that both of them are gone. Ever since Saul's death, I try to keep my positive attitude, but deep inside, I felt like that I was going to break down. One of guys here at college told me, "You need to let the pain go now." :lol: I was so pissed that I was about to punch the hell out of him, but luckily, my friend saved me from that by pulling me and left him. Well, I know that I have to let the pain go, but it takes some time to let rest of the pain to go. Oh man...I really miss Saul SO MUCH. :sad: First Saul's birthday, my birthday, first last day of school, first 4th of July, first Halloween, first Thanksgiving, first Christmas, and first New Year's without Saul were sad and little bit horrible for me because I just experienced them without him. I remember on the day of my birthday, I was so excited to be 19 years old, and anyways, I was really expecting Saul to call me and said, "Yo Mike, happy birthday, dude!" But, the last time I heard him say this to me was on my 18th birthday. I still miss that. He was supposed to turn 18 on April 21st, 2008 and he was supposed to have a first experience to go to the club...Sadly, he never got a chance to. But what really comforts me a lot is that I knew that Saul is having awesome "firsts" with God and I'll bet that he really enjoys celebrating holidays with God. I know for sure that Saul is up in Heaven, watching over us always and protecting us for rest of our lives.

Well, Saul, you are the man! We all still miss you a lot and it still hurts as hell... Anyways, I am glad that you are enjoying being with God and that you are with God for eternal! Anyways, some things at college remind me of you and I really wish that you are still here. But I know that I can't do anything about that. If I could get a wish, it would be that I would be with you and chill with you again. I'll betcha that you are so proud of me working extremely hard in college and being on Dean's List. I know that you are happy that Tara and I still love each other so much and deeply. Well, don't worry, your brother is doing good, but he still misses you a lot. Please watch after him and protect him. I know that you did an excellent job protecting your brother. For once again, I am not saying good bye to you because I KNOW FOR SURE THAT I WILL SEE YOU LATER! WE ALL WILL BE TOGETHER AGAIN ONE DAY!! Well, Saul, keep watching and protecting us always. Tell VJ and Quintin hi for me. I miss you and I love you. See you later!

Well... I'd better go to sleep now. Good night!

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