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Cynus

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Posts posted by Cynus

  1. A very thoughtful and challenging account. Be sure to read the two follow-up pieces to get the fuller understanding of this man's journey.

    Thank you for that. I hadn't noticed the links. I particularly liked the second one.

  2. Disclaimer: This one is particularly erotic, so if you aren't in the mood for such a thing I suggest you look elsewhere.

    The Dream

    by Cynus

    You lie there sweet and peaceful,

    A dream waiting to be had.

    I cannot watch your slumber,

    Without wanting to be bad.

    I approach and lean toward you,

    My breath upon your ear.

    I whisper soft and sensual,

    To announce that I am here.

    Eyes now flutter open,

    And you meet my lustful gaze,

    You smile at me and match it,

    Never ceasing to amaze.

    Your lips are soft and eager,

    And they quickly meet my own.

    You pull me down into you,

    And I let out a moan.

    My hands slide up your shirt,

    As you unbutton mine,

    And with hearts both bare and beating,

    Our bodies now entwine.

    Inhibition fades in seconds,

    As do all thoughts of rest.

    You kiss and nip my neck,

    My hands glide across your chest.

    I begin to move down lower,

    As my tongue explores your skin.

    I fumble with your belt,

    Then I free the prize within.

    I reveal your skin completely,

    And no longer can be chaste.

    With but a pause to view your beauty,

    I move in to take a taste.

    I tease about you slowly,

    That my senses may be sated.

    And when your impatience reaches climax,

    You find the pleasure you awaited.

    You grip my hair so tightly,

    And my mouth does not complain,

    For I have wanted this forever,

    And am unable to refrain.

    When you’ve neared your ending,

    I reluctantly pull off,

    I smile as you whimper,

    Wondering if you’ve had enough.

    Your eyes plead with a promise,

    That you are surely ready,

    I smile and shed my clothing,

    And then I hold you steady.

    I pause before your entrance,

    Then push in slow but strong,

    Which soon becomes a rhythm

    And our moans become a song.

    I grasp you in my hand,

    As we thrust against each other.

    And match the rhythm, stroking

    One thrust after another.

    We scream and cry together,

    As our bodies find release.

    And then collapse in bliss,

    As our stamina depletes.

    I smile at you in wonder,

    Though I’m suddenly feeling weak.

    You grin back at me with love,

    And gently kiss my cheek.

    We entwine again and pause,

    My hands resting on your thigh.

    I fall asleep in peace,

    With nothing but a sigh.

    I wake alone but happy,

    The dream it felt so right,

    But now I can’t but wonder,

    Will you dream of me tonight?

  3. I like the way this can apply to us as a culture as well. The way we as a culture have at times seen people as different, and found them wanting. And we push them to the side because of that difference, despite the fact that all they want is to be loved.

  4. I just finished this film, and I was blown away. I initially picked it because I was in the mood for something erotic.

    What I got was a completely different experience once I was two thirds of the way in. This is a very emotional film, and is so important to who we are in this world as many of us at this forum are gay or bisexual men. If you're willing to give it a view, please stick through to the end, because you'll find it is a very different film than the GoGo dancer culture it's advertised to be about.

  5. There are so many books out there, so many that are good and perspective changing, that it would be incredibly unlikely for everyone to have the same list. It doesn't surprise me in the slightest that books one would consider to be life changing for them might not make it on to others' lists, because five is a very small number to have to pick from the vast library available to us in this age. I don't think To Kill a Mockingbird would make it onto my top five, but I'd say it's probably in my top twenty. But I could probably list a hundred books that I would want to take with me and whittling it down to five would be incredibly difficult.

    I've never read Huckleberry Finn. Maybe I should give it a whirl?

    I know it would surprise those familiar with what I write, but I don't think that much fantasy would make it into my top five either. I'd be far more inclined to take things more philosophically minded, like Original Wisdom by Robert Wolff.

  6. She watched him stumble to the edge of the platform and fall into the path of the subway train. She heard the screams and watched people’s shocked reactions. But she didn’t scream and she wasn't shocked. She realized that she didn’t give a shit about him any longer.

    Colin :icon_geek:

    I'm trying to determine if this is a tragedy or not... I think I might enjoy it.

  7. I'm in, here's the first suggestion I came up with.

    With one foot through the doorway he turned back for the briefest of moments. The look in his eyes said it all. He wouldn't be coming back, and that was that. The next moment he was gone, and with him went the dream that life would ever be simple again.

  8. I used to hate labels. Still do in fact, but in order to facilitate communication they are sometimes necessary. I've identified by several labels throughout my life regarding my sexuality, and bisexual was one I used for a long time. It was only when I discovered that pansexuality was a thing that I abandoned bisexuality as the identity I gave to people, so I think i can offer some perspective.

    It certainly isn't greed. Greed would imply that I was seeking those encounters with both men and women, and for most of my life I haven't been. After I lost someone very important to me, I withdrew from seeking for relationships for quite some time, but that didn't mean I stopped being attracted to people. I have been, and continue to be, attracted to both genders. My first crush in life was on a boy, the second and third on boys, and then my fourth crush was a girl. And then my fifth crush was a girl. And then I went back to boys for awhile, with the occassional girl sneaking in there. Now that I'm an adult, it's actually much closer to fifty fifty on my attraction than it was as a teenager.

    But greed certainly doesn't generate the attraction, at least not greed of having sex. I don't even like sex very much, to be completely honest with you. I am far more concerned with intimacy than sex, and they are certainly not the same thing. You can have sex with someone and not be truly intimate, and you can be truly intimate with someone without having sex. Maybe there are some bisexual people who are greedy for sex, but I can definitely vouch that there are also those that aren't.

    I agree with the premise stated above that sexuality is fluid, since that aligns with my nihilistic view of the world. Nothing is set in stone, no matter how much we want to believe that it is.

  9. The Proposal

    By Cynus

    A breath withheld,

    Caught, like I by you.

    Waiting for the moment,

    The release of the strain;

    The anxiety.

    A question raised,

    Posed, from me to you.

    Waiting for the answer,

    The release of the doubt;

    The anxiety.

    A thought provoked,

    What am I to you?

    Waiting for the decision,

    The release of the tension;

    The anxiety.

    An answer given,

    Received by me from you.

    Waiting no longer,

    For the release.

    But now there is new emotion.


    Once again, I posted this as a means of release. Feel free to comment if you want.

  10. Thank you, Cole. I agree with your first paragraph, and I'm glad you liked it.

    Also, I'm happy to have some resolution now on the emotions that originally spawned this, but it was still good to get this out of my system.

  11. Insanity.
    You, my thoughts, this moment.

    Every moment.

    I cannot spend one without you.

    But yet you are not here.

    What then am I to do with these thoughts?

    I feed them to the aether and watch them disappear

    For without you no thoughts are worthwhile.


    I didn't spend the time to polish this off. The thoughts were simply running through my head and I needed an outlet for them. This seemed as good a place as any. Feel free to comment if you would like, but I did not write this for it to be good, I wrote this to calm down.

  12. "I think if a reader is going to dig in the archives for an example of the kind of story we all like to see..."

    "This story should be on the list for each new reader on the AD site..."

    This way of thinking is interesting to me... Perhaps we could form some sort of "Introduction to AwesomeDude" section, where we could potentially nominate stories that we think are representative of AwesomeDude as a whole that a new reader could look at without having to "dig through the archives". Though it would be difficult to be fair in determining which stories would be included and which ones wouldn't be.

    Edit: Now that I think about it, I suppose "Dude's picks from the past" already accomplishes this purpose to some degree.

  13. Hi all, I'm working on my first novel (!), for a local contest. It's an urban fantasy with a caribbean flavor. I'm in the middle of chapter 2 right now. Since the first chapter is so important in a novel, I'm hoping to get some immediate feedback so I can make sure I don't paint myself into a corner with bad choices. Anyone interested in taking a look at the first chapter? Also, if anyone likes that first chapter enough, they're welcome to stick around to help with the rest.

    I can help you with a first chapter, though I can't guarantee I can stick around after that. I specialize in fantasy so you have me intrigued. My email is on my author page.

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