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Remembering Codey


Grant Bentley

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Four years ago today, on November 4th, we lost Codey. Let us never forget him, his courage, his compassion, his love of writing, or his dream.

http://www.codeyswor....php?f=3&t=2341

You can light a candle in his memory at

http://www.gratefuln...?l=eng&gi=codey (48h)

and/or

http://www.penguinhu...all/codeyscloud (forever)

Sorry I didn't post this sooner.

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I have been dealing with all the things related to my grandmother's illness and having to put her in a nursing home for a week now.

It reminded me very much of losing Codey, who was a best friend and close to a son and brother. He was unique, and the bond I felt was the best I'd had in years.

I really feel for Tim and their family.

Somehow, we find a way to go on after loss. We are changed. I cannot see a person in a wheelchair or a wheelchair itself without thinking of him, or my grandmother, or my mother, or a few other friends I've known. Because of those experiences and what I myself deal with, I can't help but keep them in mind and do my best when around people who need that little bit extra to be just one of the guys or girls.

Nov. 4th, I was out running errands for us (my grandmother and me). I'm behind on everything in my life, including things for her. But now I'm making a tiny, tiny bit of progress, more than I have each day in months. There were all the little boring everyday things and the little (and big) worries. My biggest two tasks right now are to make sure I can make this stick, the best chance she and I have had in ages; and to rebuild my life before I run completely out of savings a very few months from now. And with her in a nursing home...it reminds me too much of losing my friend. This nursing home stay is permanent. I don't know yet how much or if she'll recover. So...yeah.

I have seen the value recently in something hugely important to Codey: not just acceptance, but the value of humor, remembering the good stuff and laughing at life, and putting the bad aside and going on.

Thanks, Codey, for being there. I miss you a lot and look forward to seeing you again someday, however that works out, in that world next door.

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