TalonRider Posted December 12, 2014 Report Share Posted December 12, 2014 Dear Friends, I have been watching you very closely to see if you have been good this year and since you have I will be telling my elves to make some goodies for me to leave under your tree at Christmas I was going to bring you all gifts from the 12 days of Christmas, but we had a little problem. The 12 fiddlers fiddling have all come down with VD from fiddling with the 10 ladies dancing, the 11 lords leaping have knocked up the 8 maids a-milking, and the 9 pipers-piping have been arrested for doing weird things to the 7 swans a-swimming The 6 geese a-laying, 4 calling birds, 3 French hens, 2 turtle doves and the partridge in a pear tree have me up to my sled runners in bird poop!. On top of all this! Mrs. Claus is going through menopause, 8 of my reindeer are in heat, the elves have joined the gay liberation and some people who can't read a calendar have scheduled Christmas for the 5th of January. Maybe next year I will be able to get my sh*t together and bring you the things you want. This year I suggest you get your a$$es down to Walmart before everything is gone. Love, Santa Link to comment
DesDownunder Posted December 13, 2014 Report Share Posted December 13, 2014 And just what happened to the ~five gold rings? Does the IRS know you haven't declared them? Link to comment
TalonRider Posted December 13, 2014 Author Report Share Posted December 13, 2014 Maybe he's keeping them for himself. Link to comment
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