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Brokenhearted.

EleCivil

Entry posted by EleCivil

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Just got back from the doctor. Turns out I'm having some heart arrhythmia, and they can't figure out why. I'm due for an EKG on Wednesday.

The last couple days, I've had to pop some aspirins to stop the chest pain it's been giving me. Those things thinned out my blood, so I can't stop bleeding from where I nicked myself shaving (and from the hole they punched through my arm to give me the ol' Transylvania treatment) . Now I'm covered in band-aids - it looks like I lost a Camp Sissyboy Slap-n-Scratch Fight ™.

So, what's the deal? I don't drink, I don't smoke, I don't eat meat, I work out regularly...why's my heart feel like it's gonna explode outta my chest, Alien-style?

...OF COURSE!

That's it. It's an alien. Obviously, a hostile life form has chosen my chest as a place to cocoon itself while it matures from its pupal stage to its adult form, upon which time it will burst out, grab a top hat and cane, and sing "Hello, My Baby".

I seem to have nothing but trouble with extraterrestrials. It's always "chest-bursting" this, or "death ray" that, or "To Serve Man...it's a cookbook!". Never met one who just wants me to draw a picture of a sheep (or a python digesting an elephant). Lame.

4 Comments

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Tanuki Racoon

Might I ask if you're taking Claritin-D? I was and that is one of the possible (but rare) side effects. Seriously. Check out anything you're taking with pseudephrine (sp?) I was fine with it and then one day I wasn't. Once I stopped it took nearly a week before I was back to normal.

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Madrigal

Might be something you're eating.Maddy (:P.S.It's because the alien wants you to draw a hat, but you keep drawing the elephant. :PLe Petit Prince. I have that in three languages ^_^ (though I can't understand much of the french version >.>).

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blue

Hey, EC,I hope your EKG and any other tests have shown what's going on. Now, if you have two heartbeats, it means one of at least three things:1. You are pregnant. I don't wanna think too much about the delivery possibilities. (UPS? FedEx?)B. You are indeed carryin' an alien critter. Are you sure there's not a pod in your room? No, not an iPod and not a pea pod. A *pod* pod. Where's Ripley when you need her? Girl's always runnin' off someplace....III. You *are* an alien -- with two hearts. I'm not too up on it, but I think if you're a Trill or a Kzinti or... OK, I'm way too geeked out today. Neeever mind.Anyway -- All kidding aside, I really hope whatever it is will be livable or fixable. Many hugs and best wishes.

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