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bi_janus

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Posts posted by bi_janus

  1. Whitman Among the Baptists


    Bi Janus



    “What a friend we have in …”


    With own eyes level


    between heaven and hell


    the boy finds his eyes


    in the back of the hall.


    Easing against the wall,


    water drips from his linen shirt


    fresh from some baptismal font.


    Both hear the crowd’s voices,


    raised as one, rattle


    the metal folding chairs,


    as, eyes closed and faces


    turned toward heaven,


    it searches for Him —


    it could only be Him.



    Bird song over the drooping sun,


    beards and loose joints,


    muscles and sweat smell


    break the spell


    as the boy pulls his arm


    over his own shoulder, shelter


    from the believers’ fears,


    his needs too close


    under his skin, pressing


    against crowd conscience,


    pulling him away from Him


    toward him.


  2. Young adult fiction about a 14-year-old who is attracted to a slightly older boy from across the tracks, literally. A quick read that deals with issues of parental authority and the conflict between what others think is right and what you know is right. The book deals with Armenian culture, food, and family in an engaging way. A quick read, but a nice first novel by a screenwriter.

  3. Calla Lilly


    Bi Janus



    You squatted by the fireplace,


    a gift to Ann from work family.


    We thought you a premie


    unlikely to survive.


    None of your kind


    we seem able to nourish,


    none of your kind


    in our bright home flourish,


    but we will tend you


    with the uncertain terror,


    with the rigorous care


    attending uncertain life.



    Then, the miracle.


    You turned your insides out


    in a profusion of white blossom,


    little vulvae with yellow tongues,


    perhaps an attempt


    to say everything at once


    unable to restrain your joy.


    Visitors worshipped, awed


    as Magi once were.


    The silence after that outburst


    was more the calamity.


    For eight years — only green,


    healthy but only green leaves,


    your silence in the face of our care


    was grievous.



    Today as I poured the water,


    in the midst of the green,


    the single white furl,


    more shot through


    with your pure voice


    than the cacophony


    of your infancy,


    the whisper piercing us


    through accustomed silence.


  4. If your encounters with an author's works are helpful, that's enough. Having never known Bukowski, I can't criticize the way he lived his life, and all I am left with is the way he expressed himself, in this case, in verse. If, in the quotation in your signature block, he had said, "I am terrorized and flattened by trivialities, I am eaten up by nothing," I would have found the statement more sympathetic. I can't argue with the sense of the first or second sentence.

    If my complaint was stroked with too broad a brush, I cheerfully retract it, although I'm not sure who he means by "the average human being" in the poem. Thanks, again, for sharing the work and what it means to you.

  5. While I have a deep distrust of most conventional religion, I've always thought that the point of Bukowski's work is that the only trustworthy person is Bukowski. He thought that no one who criticized him understood art. That, and I've always thought he was a straight Ginsberg wannabe. If average men and women have average love and genius hatred, I'm screwed, and so are the people I love and detest.

    I'm glad, though, to see Cynus bringing even Bukowski here. Just because you don't like someone's work is no reason to avoid it, and even a blind hog (Bukowski) occasionally roots up a truffle.

  6. You Will Go
    Bi Janus

    When the music fades,
    when you look him
    or her
    through the windows
    of the soul, yes,
    the eyes and even after
    the eyes close,
    so that all the sighs,
    the softness
    at your fingertips,
    the attar of skin,
    the savor of sweat
    end equivocation,
    and he or she,
    drowning in love, asks
    from whom did you learn,
    I hope you whisper
    my name.

  7. AP reports that Kenyan author Binyavanga Wainaina publicly comes out.

    NAIROBI, Kenya — African literary light Binyavanga Wainaina announces he is gay to protest laws criminalizing homosexuality on the continent.

    The prize-winning Kenyan author marked his 43rd birthday with an online essay in which he writes how he regrets not telling his mother that before she died. His story contributes to an increasingly fierce debate about gays in Africa, where it is illegal to have homosexual sex in most countries.

    Wainaina told The Associated Press in an interview Wednesday that he came out to help preserve his dignity.

    He lashed out at new legislation further criminalizing homosexuality in Nigeria and Uganda. He also criticized Russian President Vladimir Putin for Russia's stance on gays.

    Gays in many parts of Africa face severe harassment, physical threats and judicial punishment. Kenya has a law banning sodomy.

  8. Thank you all very much for the warm comments. The most usual question I got when I was giving polygraphs was whether pressing a thumbtack into a sensitive anatomic structure would fool the machine. The answer is no, however clenching one's sphincter might be a useful general training exercise. There's a reason that polys aren't admissible in court.

  9. Drifting
    Bi Janus

    Out on the perilous deep
    Where dangers silently creep
    And storms so violently sweep
    You're drifting too far from the shore

    Drifting too far from the shore (from the shore)
    Drifting too far from the shore (peaceful shore)
    Come to Jesus today, let him show you the way
    You're drifting too far from the shore

    —Charles E. Moody (1923)

    The shore vaguely recalled
    the expanse now home
    and no clear path
    I shall find my own

    Storm spun or glass
    no avatar strides
    the deep ocean
    no idea instructs

    The great vehicle
    carries me on
    I am all and alone
    boat and sailor

    Starless sky comforts
    Boundless sea comforts
    Shoreless, I came from this
    to this I gladly return

    For the shore is a prison

  10. Take your poets where you find them.

    When Reed was a teenager in 1956 he received Electroconvulsive Shock Therapy in part as an attempt by his parents to cure his sexual interest in men. He used the experience to write Kill Your Sons, a song-poem I've always admired.

  11. The Dark Spring
    Bi Janus

    And it was almost a girl, and she came out of
    that single blessedness of song and lyre,
    and shone clear through her springtime-veil
    and made herself a bed inside my hearing.
    Sonnets to Orpheus, I,1—Maria Rainer Rilke

    What flows from me
    when you tap me
    as Moses did the stone
    before the elders?


    Your staff is curved
    and pulses with your heart,
    unleashing from me
    the darkening blood.

    The note from collision
    of rod and stone
    floats as a girl's song
    above our wrestle.

    What will you have me do?
    I cannot brighten the blood
    for our pagan Eucharist.
    Listen, mon semblable,

    We are twins
    born of the same girl
    asleep in our hearing,
    her song floating

    Above us as we strive
    in the darkening blood
    to understand who we are,
    why we are as we are.

    Don't despair, sweet friend,
    when your mad pounding
    can no longer summon
    my blood in a dry land.

    The girl sleeps again
    in both of us now,
    and will sleep in you,
    dreaming us as we are.

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