Prostate trouble

[Bruin Fisher]

It's a terrible compulsion but sometimes it just takes control of me and I am impelled to write this stuff. And when I do you get subjected to the results. Sorry!

(Oh, and apologies up front to poor Des, who is maligned vicously in the first of these!)

Our Des, who's a hundred years old

(Or, roughly that age, so I'm told),

Gets up for a slash

Runs a thirty yard dash

Thrice nightly, and always wins gold.

The guy has to look after me,

He must - I'm his prostate, you see.

The doc gave a prod

(Felt like his mate's rod)

And declared that I'm A1 healthy.

?Lift your knees up!? the doc said, and pressed

His finger inside me, no less.

Ignoring my pride

He stroked side to side

And I spurted all over his chest.

A doctor called Coriolanus (wait for it!)

Wanted to test me for gayness.

He got me disrobed

And he prodded and probed

Till I called out ?you've found it ? my... armpit!?

[DesDownunder]

Good Lord, what are we going to do with you Bruin?

I hasten to tell all that I only look 100, I'm actually 99 and looking for an older part-time lover for when my 85 year old boyfriend (He never reads these posts) is asleep.

As for prostate problems, make sure to take around 2grams of turmeric in your food everyday. Turmeric is a spice used in Sri Lankan food and I read a report that said the men in Sri Lanka do not have prostate cancer because of it.

Also you might like to investigate taken a supplement of 150mcg Selenium everyday to keep the prostate healthy. Works for me, my PSA blood test is very low since taking it. But as always check with your health care professional. (My cardiologist approves it for me. He is an expert in matters of the heart and the prostate is part of my love life.)

There was a dear man called Bruin,

Who thought his prostate, he would ruin,

But he accepted his fate,

And lay down prostrate

For whatever his friend was brewin'.

[Bruin Fisher]

That's lovely, Des. Thanks.

I don't think I've ever had a limerick written about me before!

I'll frame it and hang it on the wall.