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A Lame Joke, a Weird Dream, and a Cock Roach


R.J.

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I'd rather you hear it from me than from somebody else. Yes, lame jokes make me laugh. I was listening to the radio yesterday -- well, it was actually the neighbor, but the radio was so loud I had no other choice -- when I heard this joke. I didn't roll on the floor or try to get my ass off myself, but I did laugh out loud. I just thought I'd share it with you. I know I'm not the only one who would like this joke.

Man1: Dude, my wife made me choose between love and my friends.

Man2: What did you choose?

Man1: Love, of course.

Man2: Then why are you here?

Man1: Dude, I love you!

Ok, I admit I still couldn't keep myself from giggling a bit after typing that. I hope some of you enjoyed it. Besides, I translated that from Tagalog for you. You should thank me.

It's eleven a.m. when I woke up. The president is about to deliver her State of the Nation Address, and I'm still wiping the sleepiness from my eyes. Good morning. I just had this dream that woke me up. It was weird, kind of funny, but I still want to "continue" it. Unfortunately, I can't.

I was in a wake with an ex. I didn't know who was dead nor did I look in the coffin. It was a dream and the me in the dream was doing his own thing. He was being huggie and kissie with the ex in front of everyone. Scandalous. The people at the wake were watching us. Then out of nowhere -- I never saw where they materialized from -- three women appeared and walked to the coffin. One of them was crying, and somehow, I knew that she was the mother. She wailed loudly while me and the ex were fortunately still with clothes on. All of a sudden, the mother said to the coffin, "Why are you late?" And it was in English too. Not Tagalog. I was like "Huh?" in the dream, but everyone in the room was laughing. They laughed like those laughs you hear when watching sitcoms. Weird. I never did know what the ex's reaction was to the mother's line back there because I woke up right after everyone laughed.

I purposely separated the word into two because all the other titles were two words. I hate them. Cockroaches, I mean.

Last night, before going to sleep, I was on a rampage inside my room. I was chasing around this cockroach, and it was chasing me too. I had a photocopy of a part of the book we were studying rolled up like a nightstick in my hands. I was furiously hacking at it, but it was too fast. Or maybe I was too slow. Either way, it kept getting away.

It kept flying around the room that I almost wish I knew how to swing a bat in baseball. The funny thing about it was that everytime I took a swing at the roach, it would suddenly fly to another direction making me miss the target. It was frustrating and funny both at the same time. The roach was flying fast too. There was one time when it flew at the direction of my face. I didn't try to swing at it. Instead, I ducked out of the way. I just didn't have time to think about what to do. If I had, I would have done a matrix back there.

Unfortunately, the insect escaped under my bed.

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I agree with Des, terrific (no, that was great) blog entry. :hug: The mother, in speaking to the coffin, was probably making a joke, as in "You'll be late to your own funeral." There was probably nobody in there. I read somewhere, or maybe saw it on TV, that cockroaches actually release gasses from their nether regions, which propels them faster than they would normally be expected to travel as an insect of that size. In other words, you were trying to use a rolled up paper to intercept a jet fighter. No wonder you weren't able to connect. :hug:

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Cockroaches are jet propelled? Hmm. This Emu's not convinced.

Man1: Dude, my wife made me choose between love and my friends.Man2: What did you choose?Man1: Love, of course.Man2: Then why are you here?Man1: Dude, I love you!
Man2: Kung ano ang puno, siya ang bunga.Mabuhay!Camy :hug: ps ya gotta love Wikipedia!
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Des, I hope you're not just being nice about the joke. lol. Glad to make you laugh.Trab, wow, I guess you're right with the dream bit. It's still weird though.Camy, I honestly don't know what you mean with that line. lol. It's almost like "Like father, like son" in English. And, wow, I knew it! The girl Keanu exorcised in Constantine spoke tagalog. Thanks, Camy.So... the damn pest was jet propelled...

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