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Two "newsish" issues


ChrisR

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Two things in the news this week have grabbed my attention for less-than-stellar reasons and I just wonder why some things change and others stay the same. The two issues are fairly unrelated except in their time frame.

For starters, there were [at least] two national news articles about teen boys being molested by their female middle/high school teachers. But as has been the story for years, the incidents are not known as "rape" or "molestation". Oh no. These cases are defined as a "romp" and a "tryst" for the boys. Considering that, had genders been reversed, there's no doubt it would have been universally decried as "RAPE!" - is it me or is there a pretty serious dichotomy here?

The second item is a rather sharp upturn in well-known performers coming out of their respective closets and announcing their... flexibility?... in gender identification. What has me mildly curious is the fact that several of these "newly out" folks are people who seem more interested in restarting their stalled careers, such as Aaron Carter and Thomas Dekker. Now that "Gay, Etc." is seen as positive, how much is real and how much is simply casting a wider net for fans?

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Sex scandals always grab space in the news, and what young man hasn't had that Hot for Teacher moment while in school? Of course, mine was the fantasy I had about my Civics teacher, Mr. H while in eighth grade. He was such a handsome man and smelled delightful. But in the hetero world, boys crush on teachers all the time.  Most of these attractive women ought to understand a relationship would be unacceptable.

I suppose being the object of a boy's desires is just too much for some of these teachers and that is why there are such strict rules about student/teacher contact. In the man with boy scenario, we always look at the man as the aggressor. In the woman with boy, I would guess that a major factor might be the boy's aggression, or at least his willingness to participate.

Society is long past the wink, wink stage of acceptance when adolescent boys might earn a pat on the back for having a dalliance with an older woman. But teachers are not in the sex trade and so those who allow themselves to be caught up in sexcapades with students will pay a heavy price for that folly.

 As for the coming out: don't you think that being in the closet is far worse? Back in the day these stars had managers, handlers and studio pressure to maintain the image...they did what they were told. Fans equal money, and negative publicity endangered that formula. Now many of us in society see that there are far worse issues in the world of the famous than being gay. It has to be easier to come out when your name isn't top of the list anymore. I wish Mr. Carter lots of luck.  

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6 hours ago, Chris James said:

 

 As for the coming out: don't you think that being in the closet is far worse? Back in the day these stars had managers, handlers and studio pressure to maintain the image...they did what they were told. Fans equal money, and negative publicity endangered that formula. Now many of us in society see that there are far worse issues in the world of the famous than being gay. It has to be easier to come out when your name isn't top of the list anymore. I wish Mr. Carter lots of luck.  

 

I think the point Chris R was making, though, was the possibility that some of these people were 'coming out' as a notoriety stunt rather than a true expression of their feelings.  I read the Aaron Carter message and it sounded a little weird to me, the way he expressed it.  I think Chris's comment could have some veracity in it.  Once famous, the urge to stay that way is profound, and the loss of it feels catastrophic.

C

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Teacher pupil relationships are a difficult and delicate subject, because one, they revolve around 'abuse of a position of trust' and two, they may involve 'under age sexual relations'.

Having stated that, every case is different, and there do exist such relationships founded in love that endure a lifetime. There is nothing intrinsically wrong with a relationship between two people with a big age gap. It is against the law for a teacher and pupil to be in a relationship, but what I would like to say is that it is not always right to condemn all such relations.

The French president married his teacher, a woman twenty years his senior. I worked some years ago with a young lady over a long period on a project together, during which time I shared with her being gay, and she in turn explained how she had met and fallen in love with her husband whilst still at school, when he was her teacher. Their relationship was at first conducted in secret, because of the dire consequences if it were discovered. Nevertheless, they carried on a sexual relationship until such time as they could get married.

There is a need to protect 'children' but we should not deny them the right to determine their own lives. We want to protect, not destroy their futures.

 

 

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