Jump to content

Coney Island Boyfriend, a love poem by Tragic Rabbit

Recommended Posts

I haven't written poetry in AGES but one tickled me awake this morning so I coughed up it. Here it is.





You buy me Cotton Candy, oh,

Twisting pink upon a stick, and you say,

Touch your lips against the sweetness

And my tongue darts out to lick.

You are lighter than the air, love,

As your pink sugar melts to cream,

And this lovely light confection

Is twice as tasty as my dreams.

You, my Coney Island Boyfriend,

Take us to the Roller Coaster Ticket Man;

You tear it twice, and then, oh softly,

You place the paper in my palm.

My Admission, yes, and yours, take us

To an open car (where you hold my trembling hand);

And we sink slowly down together, ah,

Into that Red and Raucous Ride.

Side by side and skin to skin, we

Ready for the Ride, oh yes,

Bright lights and great confusion that just

Bring me safe into your eyes.

Now locked together, you lean over and

Touch your lips to mine and whisper,

Lover, Don?t be Frightened, Oh no,

I am Right Here by your Side.

I smile and close my eyelids, Love,

And feel your heartbeat in your touch;

It takes me past colored lights and Crowd Noise

Into the Tunnel of Just Us.

As world around us dims, Love,

To you, yes, inside my Carnival;

I take a breath and, then relax, Love,

And we begin that long, long Climb.

Ascending up so slowly, you

Take me sweetly to that height;

Scary but I know (yes, know!) that

We two together will keep me safe.

Up, Up, the pressure builds, Love,

Until we are poised upon the peak,

So far above the others, Lover,

Heart by heart and on the brink.

You say, Oh, God, Yes, this is It now! and

Close your brooklyn eyes of brown;

Our car positioned, we nudge slow, Love,

Into the dip that draws us down.

I hold my breath and pray, yes, but

I never really fear; no, no shiver of a doubt,

Even I have learned to trust, oh,

Yes, even I have learned to Shout.

And Cry Out, oh, yes I do, Love,

As you take me down that slope;

Rushing wind and rainbowed crowds blur

And my Heart is beating in my throat.

We rip right through the atmosphere

Tearing right on past my terror ?til

I dare to open up my eyes, Love, to see us

Balanced light upon that ribboned rail.

Dear God, my Love, the lights flash!

And the solid earth is far below,

But you wipe away the tear and fear

And, yes Love, I really, truly Know.

I know that you will comfort me, as my

Cry escapes my throat, a sound,

As our twin hands and hearts grow tight

And we hurtle faster toward the ground.

I know the joy is in the danger, Love,

The thrill is in the feel, oh yes, and the

Friction of descent, but Lover,

Your love has let me open up my eyes.

So I ride your steely rails, my Love,

I let you drive me up and down;

Climbing high we pierce the sky,

Only to fly down fast and wild.

Love, the moments when we dive low

I am still safe because of you;

You are the one I gave my soul to,

You are the one I finally trust.

So take me on your Roller Coaster

With the wind singing in my ears;

I will hold you that much tighter, love,

For I have tossed away my Fears.

Link to comment
Guest rusticmonk86

This was awesome. Your imagery was intense, your vocabulary was immense. I couldn't think of a thing you could possibly add. Thought, I can say this was an experience I wish I had. Too bad . . . I'm afraid of roller coasters. ;)

Link to comment
This was awesome. Your imagery was intense, your vocabulary was immense. I couldn't think of a thing you could possibly add. Thought, I can say this was an experience I wish I had. Too bad . . . I'm afraid of roller coasters. ;)


Well, I couldn't find anything to add either but I sure found twenty things to change. That's what I remember about writing poetry, the urge to pick at the scab until you've really made a mess. I'm stopping now, really I am.

Thanks for saying that about my something being immense. I liked using the roller coaster image for a love/sex/fear snapshot. That's what was in my head when the words tickled me awake before dawn. I'm surprised I really got up to write the thing. I've ignored, I guess, poetry tickles for so long that I guess I mistook them for the occasional rash. Since I started writing, creative type writing, I'm more inclined to actually put some of these thoughts down as they alight (like horseflies). Eventually, something might be decent but either way, I'm having fun.

Fear of roller coasters is probably as common as fear of love...but that never stops people from lining up for both. I didn't make up the connection, people always write about the roller coaster of love, of emotion, I just added some pictures, I guess. Glad you liked them.



Link to comment

Coney, eh? :evilgrin:

I have this vague feeling TR is talking about more than just a day at the amusement park.

But wait, didn't you both have a hot dog? It was Coney Island, after all.

Really nice poem, clever on multiple levels.

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Create New...