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American Dream


EleCivil

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So, this guy asked me to write an intro to his paper on The Great Gatsby for him. I've never read the book, but I did it anyway. Here's what I gave him:

It all started in 1942, when Private Johnny "Slick Hips" Gatsby of the 142nd Armored Tank Division awoke in his barracks and said "What this war needs is a little soul, see?" He immediately began dismantling the weapons and turning them into jazz instruments. The German war machine stood no chance against the funky acid tunes and swinging mid-tempo beats of Johnny Gatsby and his jazz band of brothers. After vanquishing the threat of the Axis, Johnny and three of his best friends, Georgie, Paulie, and Ringo, went on to form another popular band known as "The Beach Boys." The Great Gastby is F. Scott Fitzgerald's legendary chronicling of The Beach Boys' rise to fame and eventual fall from glory.

Now, he doesn't believe a word of it, of course, but he says he'll use it anyway, because his instructor has a sense of humor. Plus, he's going to cite me as a source. I believe it's the first time I've ever been immortalized in MLA format.

"Rappers say the darndest things

That you'll ever hear

Like 'I'm edgy' and 'I'm risque'

And I say 'Better luck next year.'"

-"Avantcore" by Busdriver

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Hahaha! :: falls over :: Oh, I have no idea how that'd be graded, but as humor, it's fantastic.Heh, read the book when you get a chance. It's short and pretty good. Lots of early 20th century rich-boy angst.

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The actual book was boring and pointless, kind of like Great Expectations. I'm sure it has a cautionary message about the caustic effects of jealousy and opulent wealth, but I could care less for hoidy-toidy melodrama. And the man who called it the Great American Novel has obviously never read A Connetticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court.Seriously, a book about time travel and biological warfare written before nuclear physics was even a science is totally under-rated. Just like King Kong, only it should have won best picture over Crash. And Hayden Christiansen had no business playing Anakin Skywalker, nor should Emillio Estevez have been in Free Jack. In fact, they both should have been played by Clint Eastwood, because he has yet to kick ass in a space flick, and Space Cowboys doesn't count.

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The actual book was boring and pointless, kind of like Great Expectations.
I wouldn't publicly insult Dickens if I were you. He's been known to wake from death only to punish those who don't appreciate his works. Beware! :bunny: Maddy
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I found EC's remarks terribly cogent, because I too love ACYITCOKA and also dislike Great Expectations.Liking the former isn't strange at all as I don't think I've ever read any Twain I didn't like, and not just like a little bit. He was a truly wonderful writer. I read Huckleberry Finn about once every ten years and swear I find something I hadn't noticed before each time. And as a side note, if anyone here hasn't read Tom Sawyer, Detective, you're in for a real treat. It's hilarious.It's the latter that's unusual, because Dickens is also one of my favorites--all his books except that one. For some reason, they like to assign that one in middle or high school in English classes, and in my opinion, it turns kids off to Dickens, which isn't right. Of all his books, that 's the one I like least. Yet that's the one that gets assigned. Bummer. I don't mind it till Pip leaves home. At that point, I always lose interest. I didn't realize EleC and I were so much on the same page. Gives me a tingly feeling all over.C

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I found EC's remarks terribly cogent, because I too love ACYITCOKA and also dislike Great Expectations.[...]I didn't realize EleC and I were so much on the same page. Gives me a tingly feeling all over.
I think you're confusing me with Ryan Miller - he's the one who said he liked Connecticut Yankee. I haven't read it. Though I do dislike Great Expectations. I read it in middle school and swore off Dickens. Only a year ago did I read Oliver Twist and decided that Dickens wasn't so bad after all.
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I found EC's remarks terribly cogent, because I too love ACYITCOKA and also dislike Great Expectations.[...]I didn't realize EleC and I were so much on the same page. Gives me a tingly feeling all over.
I think you're confusing me with Ryan Miller - he's the one who said he liked Connecticut Yankee. I haven't read it. Though I do dislike Great Expectations. I read it in middle school and swore off Dickens. Only a year ago did I read Oliver Twist and decided that Dickens wasn't so bad after all.
Exactly! He wrote a lot of great books. The one that isn't is the one that gets assigned. Go figure!The Twain book is excellent, too. You ought to read it. I don't think he wrote much of anything that wasn't worth reading, and this is one of his better ones.C
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I liked A Christmas Carol by Dickens, but fell asleep through most of his other books.Mark Twain is a hero of mine. :bunny:
Yeah, but you're old. Falling asleep is to be expected.C
Well Cole, I don't fall asleep when I read your stories, in fact they have kept me awake wondering if the next chapter can possibly be as good as the last. So there, I ain't that old. :hehe::hehe::hehe:
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