So, this guy asked me to write an intro to his paper on The Great Gatsby for him. I've never read the book, but I did it anyway. Here's what I gave him:
It all started in 1942, when Private Johnny "Slick Hips" Gatsby of the 142nd Armored Tank Division awoke in his barracks and said "What this war needs is a little soul, see?" He immediately began dismantling the weapons and turning them into jazz instruments. The German war machine stood no chance against the funky acid tunes and swinging mid-tempo beats of Johnny Gatsby and his jazz band of brothers. After vanquishing the threat of the Axis, Johnny and three of his best friends, Georgie, Paulie, and Ringo, went on to form another popular band known as "The Beach Boys." The Great Gastby is F. Scott Fitzgerald's legendary chronicling of The Beach Boys' rise to fame and eventual fall from glory.
Now, he doesn't believe a word of it, of course, but he says he'll use it anyway, because his instructor has a sense of humor. Plus, he's going to cite me as a source. I believe it's the first time I've ever been immortalized in MLA format.
"Rappers say the darndest things
That you'll ever hear
Like 'I'm edgy' and 'I'm risque'
And I say 'Better luck next year.'"
-"Avantcore" by Busdriver