The CEO's Show (The Academy: Onboarding Week series)

[Homebase]

Author's Note: This short story forms part of Chapter 6 of The Academy: Onboarding Week series. Here, the Chief Executive, Shane, who jacked me off in the Induction Ceremony story, is jacked off on stage while the rest of the pledges and instructors look on. I hope you enjoy this story, because it is seriously hot. As we enter the amphitheatre room, we see Shane sitting on the bench in the glass-walled cell on stage, wearing only his BONDS boxer-briefs, his hands bound behind his back in bondage cuffs. Once the audience has gathered, Shane is led out of the cell and made to lay down on the table on stage, and is jacked off in full view of the cheering audience. Without any further ado, I present to you, Shane. Enjoy. Comments welcome and would be much appreciated. Cheers 🙂

--

 

Day 3: Wed 9 Nov 2011 (9:30am – 11:00am)

Upon arrival on the 12th floor, I noticed this floor had large rooms containing amphitheatres, each with rows of stands ascending around a centre stage, on which there was a raised dais and towards the back wall, a glass-walled cell with a single bench in it. It was inside this cell that I saw Shane (the CEO) was seated, dressed only in his jocks, shirtless, his hands bound behind his back in bondage cuffs.

 

Leading the session was instructor Theo [in Trainer Vest & Running Shorts], assisted by instructors Kevin, Conal, Ivan and Ryan Tessier, who by now had removed the clothing they were in before and were dressed in Towels only. All 24 of us pledges, dressed in Jocks only, were asked to sit in the stands of the amphitheatre together with the rest of the instructors who were seated amongst us.

 

Theo then called out to get our attention, then proceeded to release Shane from the glass-walled cell and led him to the dais, releasing Shane's hands from his bondage cuffs before getting him to lay down on the padded table in the centre of the dais, instructing him to hold on to the inbuilt handles on either side of the table near his hips. Theo stood beside Shane facing his groin, with Kevin, Conal, Ivan and Ryan standing to either side of Theo.

 

For the next 10 or so minutes, Theo, Kevin, Conal, Ivan and Ryan ran their hands over Shane's body, Shane lying down on the dais in front of them. They felt up, touched and caressed his chest, legs and face, and also made brief touches of his cock through his underwear.

 

After about 10 minutes, Theo then slowly lowered Shane's Jocks down to his thighs, exposing his dick, which he started feeling up and stroking to get hard. After another 5 minutes, Theo lubed up Shane's dick. All this went on while Kevin, Conal, Ivan and Ryan continued feeling up and running their hands over Shane's body, chest, legs and face. Once Shane had been lubed up, Theo started jacking him off in earnest, all the way to a huge orgasm. Shane came all over his chest and legs, the room erupting in cheers as he did so.

 

While Shane was catching his breath after cumming for the first time, Theo instructed everyone else in the room to start getting ourselves hard in preparation for our own orgasms. Kevin, Conal, Ivan and Ryan were told to remove their Towels and drape it over one shoulder, while us pledges in the stands were told to lower our boxers (down to our knees/ankles). Bottles of lube were handed out on stage and in the stands while we were in the early stages of jacking ourselves off.

 

Later, when Kevin, Conal, Ivan and Ryan (on stage) and the audience members (in the stands) began jacking off in earnest, Theo then turned his attention back to Shane, who was still lying on the dais, holding on to the handles. Theo relubed Shane's dick, using some of Shane's own cum from his chest/legs, and lowered his Jocks from around his thighs, pulling it down to his ankles, then unhooking it from one leg, so the Jocks were hanging off one ankle only, and slowly started jacking him off to his second orgasm.

 

Eventually, Kevin, Conal, Ivan and Ryan, naked with their Towels draped over one shoulder, came onto Shane's body in a classic bukkake. At the same time, the audience members in the stands began cumming onto their own chests/legs. Finally, Theo jacked Shane off to his second orgasm, Shane cumming once again all over his body.

 

Once everyone had cum, we were told to clean up. Kevin, Conal, Ivan and Ryan took their towels off their shoulders and used them to clean themselves up before putting their towels back on. Audience members in the stands (who had their boxers lowered to jack themselves off) were told to remove our boxers completely and use them to clean ourselves up, then stand up and use the hand holding our discarded boxers to cover our dicks.

 

In the meantime, Theo completely removed Shane's Jocks, taking it away and dropping it in a nearby collection bin. Theo then removed his own vest and now shirtless, used his vest to clean up Shane's body before also tossing it into the collection bin. Theo then gave the signal for everyone to adjourn to the communal showers two floors below.

 

Upon the signal being given, members of the audience were to file out of the amphitheatre room in an orderly manner, dropping their boxers in the collection bin on their way out, then proceed naked (with one hand covering their dicks) to the communal showers on the 10th floor.

 

Kevin, Conal, Ivan and Ryan were to proceed there in their towels, dropping their towels in the collection bins at the entrance to the showers. Theo followed the crowd out of the room, discarding his running shorts in the collection bin on the way out, proceeding to the communal showers in his boxers, discarding his boxers at the entrance to the showers.

 

Finally, Shane once he had been cleaned up by Theo, got up off the dais, buck naked, using one hand to modestly cover his now-sensitive and softening dick, followed Theo, Kevin, Conal, Ivan and Ryan off the stage and to the communal showers on the 10th floor.

 

All instructors and pledges were to gather here for a group shower before the next session, also in the amphitheatres at 11:30am. Pledges were given a towel to wear after showering.

[Rutabaga]

I feel like the same comments made for the other excerpt also apply here.  

Why are these guys here?  What's in it for them?  Is there an actual goal to all of this, or is it just a process?

Why should we care about any of the characters here?

This seems more like a premise than a story.

R

[Rutabaga]

In the same vein --

There seems to be no real dramatic tension, or risk, or danger here.  It seems like all the people will "pass" whatever this is.  Then what?  And, again, who cares?  Are they all just docile lambs?

R

[Rutabaga]

You would benefit greatly from going through the analysis set out in The Story Grid by Shawn Coyne.  This is the guidance that an editor would give you.

R

[Homebase]

Hi R,

Thanks for providing your comments. It seems that the dramatic tension element in my stories needs much further development. The internal conflicts that the characters face as they carry out the acts of undressing and getting off is something that needs much further work. I reckon I also need to add much more dialogue among the characters, that much is missing in the drafts I've written so far. I guess this comes from my background in academia; I am much less experienced in fiction writing thus I need to grow in this space. I may be an experienced writer but i'm not an excellent one, that much i acknowledge. Thus I would greatly benefit from the mentorship and insights that may be gained from a more experienced pair of hands. To this end I appeal to all readers, especially those who have kindly added their two cents worth, for assistance in this vein. Unfortunately I'm at a loss right now, disillusioned if you will. Feeling really discouraged.

I will have a look at The Story Grid, as well as the Writing Masterclass on iomfats.org, hopefully I can draw some inspiration from these. Finally, I will also keep working on my ongoing efforts at reworking the fantasy world that I am building, I've been making some adjustments in terms of the HomeRooms and mentoring relationships between the characters in this vein, and I am still trying to determine a workable arrangement that flows. Some guidance would be much appreciated to this end. 

Regards,

Homebase

[Jason Rimbaud]

Homebase,

You said your background is academia, which usually means you studied hard and worked to achieve that status. I'm sure you had some tests you flubbed, or a quiz you weren't prepared for and became discouraged in that journey. Setback and roadblocks happen all the time. And much like your academic path, you had to overcome those obstacles to move forward. 

I know it can be daunting, as if you say you have invested all this time until world building, to realize it might take a bit of work to bring your vision to life. That's one of the best things about writing, you can change or alter anything, you are the creator.

One of the best books I ever found on writing is Immediate Fiction by Jerry Cleaver. He's a founding member of the Writers Loft in Chicago and as I read that book, by the end I had a completed novel written based on how he walks you through step by step. You can find it on Amazon, it's twenty years old or more but outside of Stephen King's book on writing, its one of the best ones out there. 

And it's okay to acknowledge your feelings about being discouraged, but like I assume you didn't allow other setbacks in your life to keep you down, I'm sure with you being as creative as you are, you'll find a way to continue. 

Your premise is sound, there is an audience out there for this kind of story, I hope you find the bit of inspiration you are seeking and continue to grow as a teller of fiction. 

J

[Homebase]

53 minutes ago, Jason Rimbaud said:

Homebase,

You said your background is academia, which usually means you studied hard and worked to achieve that status. I'm sure you had some tests you flubbed, or a quiz you weren't prepared for and became discouraged in that journey. Setback and roadblocks happen all the time. And much like your academic path, you had to overcome those obstacles to move forward. 

I know it can be daunting, as if you say you have invested all this time until world building, to realize it might take a bit of work to bring your vision to life. That's one of the best things about writing, you can change or alter anything, you are the creator.

One of the best books I ever found on writing is Immediate Fiction by Jerry Cleaver. He's a founding member of the Writers Loft in Chicago and as I read that book, by the end I had a completed novel written based on how he walks you through step by step. You can find it on Amazon, it's twenty years old or more but outside of Stephen King's book on writing, its one of the best ones out there. 

And it's okay to acknowledge your feelings about being discouraged, but like I assume you didn't allow other setbacks in your life to keep you down, I'm sure with you being as creative as you are, you'll find a way to continue. 

Your premise is sound, there is an audience out there for this kind of story, I hope you find the bit of inspiration you are seeking and continue to grow as a teller of fiction. 

J

Thanks for the encouragement Jason. I'm gonna take some time to digest all the feedback you and others have given me so far, sleep on it, and hopefully my motivation will be better when I wake up in the morning. Cheers 🙂

[Talo Segura]

Everybody has their own way of writing and it's daunting to take the concept for your story and put words on paper. I thought it might help to give you my own example of how I'd write just one paragraph of chapter six, the opening paragraph. You have done all the hard work of creating the scene, all that remains is to engage the reader. It doesn't take much, a few tweaks which are aimed at describing how the main character experiences the scene you've created. If the reader can identify with the main character's emotional turmoil he will want to find out what happens next just as much as our protagonist needs to.

 

Day 3: Wed 9 Nov 2011 (9:30am – 11:00am)

 

Original

Upon arrival on the 12th floor, I noticed this floor had large rooms containing amphitheatres, each with rows of stands ascending around a centre stage, on which there was a raised dais and towards the back wall, a glass-walled cell with a single bench in it. It was inside this cell that I saw Shane (the CEO) was seated, dressed only in his jocks, shirtless, his hands bound behind his back in bondage cuffs.

Revised

I stepped out of the elevator on the 12th floor, the corridor was empty, no one else was anywhere to be seen. Why had I come here? I asked the question, but I didn't have the answer. A certain trepidation mixed with excitement gripped me as I pushed open the swing doors. Inside were rows of stands descending in curves to the focal point below, a stage with a dias and a glass walled cell. My breath was shallow, the hairs on the back of my neck tingled, a definite knowledge that something was about to happen gripped me. Centre stage, inside the cell, I saw him. Shane had his hands bound to the chair, stripped to his jocks, shirtless. I caught my breath as I fixed my gaze on the spectacle, my body trembled. What was about to happen?

[Camy]

On 7/5/2024 at 5:46 PM, Rutabaga said:

You would benefit greatly from going through the analysis set out in The Story Grid by Shawn Coyne.  This is the guidance that an editor would give you.

Curses, @Rutabaga. Now I've spent an hour gawping out to video's which make me think I should give up writing immediately, and join a monastery.

That said: good site! https://storygrid.com/resources/

-----------------

Edited to add: on reflection, I'm not convinced. Yes, Shawn Coyne is highly successful, but his method has way too many acronyms for my liking. There are a gazillion sites offering 'their' take on how to write better. Me, I'm going to stick to pottering and NaNoWriMo--Chris Baty rocks!

 

[Homebase]

On 7/10/2024 at 3:59 PM, Talo Segura said:

Everybody has their own way of writing and it's daunting to take the concept for your story and put words on paper. I thought it might help to give you my own example of how I'd write just one paragraph of chapter six, the opening paragraph. You have done all the hard work of creating the scene, all that remains is to engage the reader. It doesn't take much, a few tweaks which are aimed at describing how the main character experiences the scene you've created. If the reader can identify with the main character's emotional turmoil he will want to find out what happens next just as much as our protagonist needs to.

 

Day 3: Wed 9 Nov 2011 (9:30am – 11:00am)

 

Original

Upon arrival on the 12th floor, I noticed this floor had large rooms containing amphitheatres, each with rows of stands ascending around a centre stage, on which there was a raised dais and towards the back wall, a glass-walled cell with a single bench in it. It was inside this cell that I saw Shane (the CEO) was seated, dressed only in his jocks, shirtless, his hands bound behind his back in bondage cuffs.

Revised

I stepped out of the elevator on the 12th floor, the corridor was empty, no one else was anywhere to be seen. Why had I come here? I asked the question, but I didn't have the answer. A certain trepidation mixed with excitement gripped me as I pushed open the swing doors. Inside were rows of stands descending in curves to the focal point below, a stage with a dias and a glass walled cell. My breath was shallow, the hairs on the back of my neck tingled, a definite knowledge that something was about to happen gripped me. Centre stage, inside the cell, I saw him. Shane had his hands bound to the chair, stripped to his jocks, shirtless. I caught my breath as I fixed my gaze on the spectacle, my body trembled. What was about to happen?

Hey mate, thanks for the feedback. Apologies for the delayed response. Just a minor note of correction here - Shane had his hands bound behind his back in bondage cuffs, not bound to the chair. That's not overly important but. 

If it's OK with you, I would like to incorporate the paragraph you've rewritten above into my manuscript, and rewrite the rest of the chapter (and story more broadly) from there - it would serve as a source of inspiration to rewrite in a more "gripping" kind of tone in order to (in your words) engage the reader. Of course I won't copy it word for word, I'll make edits and tweaks probably extensively. I've spent 12 years at University in a past life so I'm well across the evils with plagiarism - which will not be detectable once I've incorporated your sample with my own editions and paraphrasing etc. Please let me know if this is OK with you. 

I'll then repost an updated version in a new thread, probably after this thread has died out. Also, I'd like to start posting my stories on the main site - though I understand I need the go-ahead from the editorial panel. What are the protocols and policy around this? It would be good if someone here could shed some light to this end - you may either reply to this thread or DM/email me, either way, I'm not fussed. Any additional advice would also be helpful and much appreciated. Thank You All.