Examina Incredibilia I

[Pertinax]

What follows are some comments received on tests in freshman history classes over many years. Here's Western Civ as seen by 18 and 19 year olds. I'm posting this after beign advised to do so by Colin and Mike, so if you don't like it, blame them, okay?

Lets begin with ancient Greece.

Greek drama originated in the church. The players would act out scenes from the Bible.

Plato founded a school that was in a cave that taught mathematics.

Platonic ideals were ideals concerning sculpture and how architecture should be arranged, whether in Ionic or Corinthian style.

Aeschylus in Greek mythology was the great god of fire.

Aristophanes was one of the great writers of tragedians he wrote about comedies.

Aeschylus was a tragic writer.

Literature was of no importance to the Ancient Greek. All their stories were told directly from the mouth, none were written down. The Architecture of the Greeks were of no value. They lived in caves.

The calif was part of the structure of greek towns. A market place. In the center is usually the parthenon of the acropolis.

Oresteia was the mother of Alexander the Great. She was crazy. She kept snakes in her bedroom. She influenced Alexander greatly. Also, if it hadn't been for her, Alexander would have never been born.

the polis was the first time man tried to organize himself.

there were the Plutonian philosophers

After Alexander in the Hellestenic Era, Ptolemy of Egypt made all the people name all their male children Ptolemy after himself.

Koran was the Emperor of Persia during the first of the Persian invasions at Rome. He was defeated at the Marathon and several other battles, he won some. His fleet was destroyed, and he was badly killed.

Ptolemy became the soul ruler of Egypt

The Athenian meak and mild and believed in the family group

Philip of Macedon conquered Prussia

Diocletian was the ruler of Carthage in ancient Greece.

Hesiod was one of the commanders under Alexander III during his conquest in Europe.

Xerxes was the Greek god of fire.

Plato was interested in heavenly bodies (up in the air, not girls)

To be a Greek citizen one had to be born in America and so should his parents.

There were two types of people the postorina who were the upper class & there were the puritans were the rest of the Greeks.

the polis was built in such a way and size that everyone could be easily seen (because the average man was about 5'8")

each polis was self-efficient

The social status was very hard to engage in.

The burning of Athens was led by Thermopylae.

Plato started a school for philosophy, for which he teached at for twenty years.

The Spartan motto was "Bring home your sword or come on a streacher."

Stoacism was the man that taught Plato in his early years. He told Plato his ideals and then plato would make conclusions of his own.

Polis was a city-state form of government; or a ruler of Egypt.

Only male men were citizens.

Platonic ideals was a belief that the physical world was a reflection of the physical world.

Aristophanes were the followers of Aristotle.

The Furies chase Orestia around and he fleas.

Aristotle said every citizen should recognize each other.

This was all before B.C.

Culturally the city-states were entirely internal.

The city-state was a true blend of Pure Greek culture.

The Albigensians were a group of people from the Classical period. They were one of the first Greek speaking civilizations. The Albigensians lived on the island of Asia. They were not very warlike but were more of a merchant oriented people.

Philip of Macedon was the greek king of Macedon who by briding and conorting the other greek city-states gain control of Greace. His son Axleisandine the Great conquerd the rest of the civilizatives world.

Eumenides was a Greek, he believed that the earth was flat and he discovered a way in which the circumference of the Earth could be measured.

Plato is noted for the parabola of the cave

Well, that's enough for now. If anyone thinks it worth while, I have lots more where this came from.

Pertinax

[The Pecman]

That renews my faith in humanity...

[Cole Parker]

Wait a sec. I'm still trying to figure out how one conorts, what specific waters surround the island of Asia, and what the men who aren't males look like.

C

[Chris James]

Sounds like Western Civilization is doomed. Is there such a class as remedial history? I would hate to see what these kids wrote for their English classes. So sad.

[Merkin]

Literature was of no importance to the Ancient Greek. All their stories were told directly from the mouth, none were written down. Love it.

[The Pecman]

Maybe that's true for one specific "Ancient Greek."

I always say, "don't knock the Greeks unless you've tried it."

[DesDownunder]

Am I missing the point, or does anyone else think this seem to be a fundamentalist home schooled gibberish version of actual history?

On the other hand, this seems so far removed from historical fact that no one could regard it as being anything but a joke, then I remember why I am an atheist.

Be careful what you say in jest...someone will probably take it seriously.

[Cole Parker]

No, I don't agree with that at all, Des. This is a regurgitation of historic facts, filtered through, for the most part, teenaged minds. They don't have solid, factual reference points for this stuff, and so try to fit it into the knowledge they already have the best they can. The fact is, most college Civilization courses throw tons of material at these kids all at once, and they read and listen while also worrying about a Calculus class assignment they don't really understand, a Chem lab where the numbers they've accumulated don't jive with reality or the textbook, and whether their condom broke last night while they were removing it or before.

I've graded tons of college papers. It's incredible what you find. It's easy to think these kids are all numbskulls. For the most part, however, they're simply overwhelmed, especially in the first two years. After that, if they're still there, their written material starts to make a lot more sense and show some actual learning.

Hats off to Pertinax for collecting this. Most teachers throw up their hands in despair. I wish I'd had more instructors who saw the humor in my folly. To do that, you have to have humanity in your soul.

C

[DesDownunder]

I need a snarky Smiley.