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5 outdated problems gay people still have

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So, gay marriage is breaking out everywhere and we're on the road to acceptance. But it seems some problems we still face really are just ridiculous in how outdated they seem:


I found #2 to be my biggest issue. (Being put in a box) I'm economically conservative, love guns, love sports, sometimes feel more bisexual than truly gay, I'm not interested in cross-dressing etc etc. and that often makes me feel like a minority inside a minority.

The idea that I (1) Have to keep coming out to new people IS nerve wracking, but then there's (2)the whole issue of having to be at odds with people in the queer community, like the gay activists who look at me like I'm scum because I say I don't want to put up flyers for their campaign etc.

Everybody has a way they seem to think people should be regarding the queer experience and suddenly you have to juggle all these factors that straight folks don't ever need to touch like telling the boss you're gay or getting called a self-hater because you say that Adam Lambert's not a good singer.

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‚ÄčThis is a potentially huge discussion with ramifications that ricochet all around the planet.

Sexuality is not that simple...or complex, but discrimination according to culture can indeed be confusing for those discovering they have attractions which are baffling.

In many ways it was simpler when I was young and on the cusp of puberty. We didn't even know it was a sin to touch another person of the same sex...we just did it. Eventually, of course, that would lead to questioning the whole notion of sin, itself. Turns out, sin is merely another social construct left over from less enlightened times, designed to make us subject to one authority or another. However, that discovery brings with it the complexity of religious control, and social conformity.

Steven, I sympathise with much of how you react to what seems expected of you in LGBTQ circles, but I urge you to be yourself, safely, carefully and confront all those who would demand you fit into a box not of your making.

Yes, I prefer to throw the box away and just be me, allowing others to assume that they know me.

There is a distinct advantage to not being obvious: you have the asset of surprise. This is particularly so, say, in telemarketing situations. Nothing makes a telemarketer disconnect the call faster than when I tell them, in my deepest voice, that my partner partner is a male.

As for being a minority in a minority, I'd have to side with Kinsey, the majority are somewhere along a sliding scale from 2 to 5. There aren't that many 1's or 6's, and those that are, are a minority unto themselves. (Also known as "somewhat straight.")

Whilst we are still fighting for same sex marriage equality in Australia, we long ago instituted anti-discrimination laws into the work place and society.

Our social security is handled by the Federal Government, Centrelink department, and they treat all unmarried couples as being in a de facto relationship.

It's not perfect, but there can be no doubt as to the equivalency between couples regardless of sex, etc.,

I once asked the discrimination board if the law permitted me to advertise for people interested in forming an all male theatre group. They told me no, I couldn't do that. So I asked if it was okay for me to advertise for interest in a gay male theatre group...their reply was that I could probably get a government grant to help set-up such a group. Go figure.

It is important to dismiss what other people think of you, especially if demands are being thrust upon you to regard yourself as a this or a that.

I assume that people know I am gay, and am surprised when I discover that I'm evidently not all that obvious. I'm just me. Gone are the days when I try to be what others want me to be. When I look back at my formative years, up to around my mid-twenties, I realise I decided to abandon minority affectation of speech and mannerisms and just be myself.

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Within the present climate of "acceptance" comes the agony of interaction. There's nothing more pain-in-the-ass than being someone else's token gay (neighbor, co-worker, workout buddy, dinner guest, car pool driver, you fill in the blank). Meanwhile these are real issues Steven has alerted us to, and we need to address them.

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