Lugnutz

A 'coon laughs? That's got to be the most ungodly sound ever.

He now has a honest to god forum up now.

What's a raccoon going to do with money? There's a dumpster by my place that he's more than welcome to pillage.

I just noticed a few updates at the Doghouse, one of those being the complete "Quarry Tales" chapters from Driver. All is there. All is well.

Sapian?

I know Wibby, does that count?

If he was eating Wil, shouldn't he be about 3 feet south of his current location? *And the thread makes its trip into the gutter...........*

Paging Hairy Palm, Paging Hairy Palm.

Maybe it's not a hug he's after. When you have your arms around him, he'll grab your arse. With both hands, or paws.

Well, I'm almost naked. a/s/l?

Well, this just in; Beagles place is there to stay. He mentioned going to a php based forum at some point and updates will be more frequent than before.

Happy now?

Cuz if I did, the raccoon would be close enough to poo in my pocket. If he promises to NOT poo, I'll give him a hug.

I'm still stuck with Win98.

The next chapter would be nice, but I'm hoping the book will be done so the next book can start. Like most everyone, I'll have to re-read it from the beginning to get my footing back.

One thing I learned about writing is nothing is trivial. There will be slow spots, but that would be explained better in future chapters. Setting up the next few chapters has to start someplace. I'm beginning to wonder if Nicky will ever surface, but I'll have to wait like everyone else for that answer. Book 3 perhaps?

Thought there was a topic about this, but I can't find it. Well, here's mine. 3 Doors Down has been a favorite for the reason that their music is positive, it helps me on my outlook on things. They have a new one out called "It's not my time". Here are the lyrics and the youtube video of it. You'll have to watch it a couple times to get the plot of it, but it's great. "It's Not My Time" Looking back of the beginning of this And how life was Just you and me loving all of our friends Living life like an ocean But now the current slowly pulling me down It?s getting harder too breath It won?t be to long and I will be going under Can you save me from this? Cause it?s not my time I?m not going There?s a fear in me it?s not showing This could be the end of me And everything I know Oh but I won?t go I look ahead too all the plans that we made And the dreams that we had I?m in a world that try to take them away Oh but I?m taking them back Cause all of this time I? we been just too blind to understand What should matter to me My friends is laughing and it?s not what we have It?s what we be live in Cause it?s not my time I?m not going There?s a fear in me but it?s not showing This could be the end of me And everything I know But it?s not my time I?m not going There?s a will in me and now I know that This could be the end of me And everything I know Oh but I won?t go I won?t go There might be more than you believe (There might be more than you believe) There might be more than you can see But it?s not my time I?m not going There?s a fear in me it?s not showing This could be the end of me And everything I know But it?s not my time I?m not going There?s a will in me and now it?s gonna show This could be the end of me And everything I know Oh There might be more than you believe (There might be more than you believe) There might be more than you can see But I won?t go No I won?t go down Yeah 3 Doors Down video

How do you delete posts????

Reminds me of something I just seen on one of the BMW boards I frequent. This was pulled from there which was pulled from somewhere else. Funny as hell none the less. Here it is......... When I was 17 my girlfriend at the time was finally ready to have sex. I, as one might expect of a 17 year old, was excited. Neither hell nor high water was going to stand between me and my final destination. I get ready for the night, trim everything up, shower extra well. Unfortunately there was also an issue. I have a digestional disorder that sometimes cause my shit to become large and quite solid while still inside me. I wasn't aware it was a treatable problem and, in fact, just thought everyone had to deal with the equivalent of anal kidney stones. I bring this up because I had a mighty one which had been loaded into the gun for several days. Let me set the scene. Her parents are away. We have her house to ourselves. She was always a little kinky so she demands we do it in her parents bed. I walk in to a candle holocaust. She's been working on this all day apparently, and its as bright as high noon in there with the lights off. Which is good, because she proceeds to do a sweet, sexy little dance for me. At 16, she was AMAZING. For those of you who never experienced a female at that age, I pity the fool. Now I'm sitting on the bed, watching this dance. I smile and tell her how good she looks. Unfortunately, most of my attention is focused on the dull throbbing from my sphincter and the large amount of intestinal discomfort associated with not dropping duce in days. But somehow I still get hard and we go to town. She starts out on top, then we switch. I bend her over the bed, and I even smack her ass (a ballsy move at the time, but she loved it). Due to my built up distraction, I last for what seems like FOREVER. She can't stop moaning and telling me how good it feels, and then she says what every man wants to hear "I want to make you go in my mouth." I **** love women. So she goes down on me. She was always average at best in the head department but at least she tried. She pops my **** out of her mouth long enough to look up at me and say "tell me if you like this". Then I feel it. She stuck her finger up my ass. My brain hits the panic switch and every muscle in my entire body locks up tighter than a three year old virgin. But its too late. I take a massive, PAINFUL, PAINFUL shit, all over her parents comforter. No, you aren't understanding. I mean large. Huge. IMMENSE. Take your largest shit and multiple it by forty-two and you'll have an idea of what flew out of me. And gents, when I say flew, I don't mean "I pooped." I mean "projectile". I mean "hurricane force winds hitting an umbrella stand". And due to my condition, it comes out as a large, dark brown, smelly harpoon. I know it hit her. I didn't see it. She ran screaming "OH MY GOD OHMYGODOHMYGODEEEEEWWWWWWWW" but I always imagined that, due to her position, it hit her right in the chin. Or at least the tits. I would like to say I got up to go after her. But I heard the bathroom door shut and I just lied there. The smell hit me after a few seconds. It smelled like someone rolled a cat in shit and threw it into a tire fire. I looked down and saw, to date, the largest bowel movement I've ever heard of laying on the bed. Then I noticed the blood, and when I did, I noticed the pain. Apparently the fact that it was so large caused it to rip my ass a little bit (thought I was bleeding from the inside. This little doctors trip the next day is what taught me of my condition). There was a small pool of blood where my ass had been. A final reminder of the exact place and moment I lost my virginity. I will treasure this memory for all my days. I grab my shit with my hands and go to the downstairs bathroom. I throw around 1/3 into the toilet and flush, fearing any more will clog it and only add to my already significant woes. I stand there, holding 2/3's of my biggest shit of all time, feeling a trickle of blood flow down my leg, trying to ignore the sharp pain stabbing my rectum. I find myself wishing I had a photo of this. Anyway, I finish flushing my baby, clean off my hands, jam toilet paper between my cheeks (I skipped the bandaid) and went upstairs. I could hear my girlfriend sobbing from behind the bathroom door. I decided not to say anything to her and just keep moving. The smell in her parents room was abysmal. Its like when you take a shit and walk out of the bathroom you think "hey not so bad today," but then you walk back in to grab your magazine and go "HOLY SHIT!". It was one of those moments. The scene is burned behind my eyelids for all time. My life. My shame. My very first time smelled like a pile of dead babies. I quickly got dressed since the heat from ten thousand candles was making the room feel more like a port-a-potty. I was aware enough to grab the comforter on my way out and drag it downstairs to their washer. Also the top and bottom sheets since the blood had leaked on through all the way to mattress. Still no sign of the GF but at this point I considered it a blessing. I jammed in the washer with 3 loads worth of detergent and set it on spin, knowing that not even the hand of God would save these linens, let alone Tide and Snuggles. Then I left. I avoided my GF's calls for days until she came to my house. We had a long talk about what happened. Talk being synonymous with "breaking up with me because I shit on her". And it was all over. She promised not to tell a soul and I don't THINK she ever did. She was probably as ashamed as I was about the whole deed. But I will always this happening as the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to me.

Damn double posts.........

Note to self: Keep the shoes in eyesight, there is a 'coon about.

Oliver, Wibby isn't going to speak to you for the period of not more than 5 minutes.

That had to be one hell of a nasty trash can....... BTW, on the other poll, I chose our resident 'coon to be ravenged by a horny female badger.