Graeme

I think I'm going to be sick.... :smt078

I'm happy to provide something, if you want to take up Talonrider's suggestion. I have a short story I wrote a couple of months ago that I haven't posted anywhere. It is not a gay story, but for this exercise, I don't think that will matter. It is three pages long.

Does that mean he gets the privilege of editing our posts for us? :-D Congratulations, aj! Graeme

Hi, Aaron, I wouldn't consider what you do for me "ghostwriting". You make significant changes to what I do, but you rarely alter the content. You improve sentence constructions by re-arranging and simplifying what I wrote, and by suggesting alternative (read: better) word choice. A ghost-writer would be one who would take the details of a story and write the words themselves. That's the definition I'd use, and I don't believe you meet that definition. Ultimately, I let you get away with your edits because: a) I think they make an improvement on what I wrote, b) I trust your judgement whenever I have a doubt, c) I know that my grammer, punctuation and word-tense leaves a lot to be desired (though, hopefully I'm improving). To me, that's part of the editing role -- not ghostwriting. I'm sorry that you received some abusive emails. Any such emails should have gone to the author, as they are the ones who have the final say in what gets published, and they clearly approved of your changes. Thanks, always, for the help you give me! Graeme

Hi, Jamie, An "essay" is being prepared. I'll start by saying that we have a couple of private forums where we can discuss things, and we're preparing our answer to your questions in one of those. From a personal note, I was extremely nervous when it came to write my chapter, as I had no idea what I was going to be given to work with. As it turned out, I probably had the easiest chapter to do as it had been left to me to start to introduce the plot. I'll have another chapter to write later, and I'm already getting nervous (again) on that one, as I can't do much planning for it until I see how the rest of the story has unfolded by then. I leave the rest of the response to come from James after we get the details together. Cheers (and thanks for the compliment, too)! Graeme

I'd certainly like to see more from him, and I said so in the email I sent him. The statement of mine that Dude quoted may be underrating Rick, but the genre is one that may not appeal to as broad a spectrum as many other stories. This is not a reflection on Rick, but a statement on people's tastes. As an example, I don't normally read historical stories. I find that too often they assume you know more about the period than I actually do (me, poor dumb Aussie) or they assume you know nothing and overload you with detail that swamps the story itself. Rick has managed to avoid both of those problems. That was why I kept it low-key -- recommending that people look at it, without saying that they must read it. It was not intended to disparage Rick at all. Finally, your honour, as a closing statement in my defense... I was still the first one to put up a post about this story which had been on the site for over a week. :-D Cheers! Graeme :p

*hugs* :(

I finally found some time to do some reading (okay -- I was depressed at work and needed something else to do), so I had a look at Castaways. A completely narrative story, told mainly from the viewpoint of one character. There are sections from the viewpoint of the other two main characters as introductions, before switching back to the original. The plot is not particularly original, but as I remarked in an email to the author, that doesn't detract from the story. Indeed, it makes it feel like a well-worn and comfortable slipper. The presentation is what makes the story. Rick has managed to portray the dangers and horrors of sailing back in the eighteenth century. I could easily picture the scenes he was portraying. I thought originally that the lack of dialogue was a deficiency, but I then realised that it has been written as a journal by the main character well after the event. As such, it is well done. It is definitely worth a look at. Graeme

Sorry, but I have to disagree with you. Axioms are not "demonstrably true" -- if they were, they would not be axioms. They are "truths" that are merely assumed to be true because it appears to be obvious. A very simple example. It is not possible to prove the world exists. After all, everything, including this post, could just be all in your imagination. The idea you have senses could just be wishful thinking. However, it is generally accepted as a "truth" because it appears to be obvious. It is not, however, "demonstrably true". Any attempt at demonstrating that this is true would need to include the assumption that you can sense the world -- and would be a good example of circular logic! Graeme

And this is the part where I respect Aaron the most. He rarely chances the content of what I write, but he is constantly sharpening that focus by the use of better words and stronger sentence constructs. Different editors have different styles, just like authors have different styles. The differences in what they do is not because some are doing things right and others wrong, but because they are approaching the tasks from different directions. In New Brother, Aaron is helping me make sure that the characters sound like teens -- my teenage years are a distant memory and I don't have a lot of interaction with modern teenagers. This means he is making a lot of changes to the prose, but the improvement that results is very obvious. In Falls Creek Lessons, Blue restricted himself to minimising the edits, but gave me a explanation of why he had made those changes and a running commentary on the plot which I also found useful in developing the storyline. I had one experience of Drake doing some editing for me, and I was blown away again. After these experiences, I can categorically state that I do not have the skills to be a decent editor, and I will always be appreciative of those of you who do. Thank you, Graeme

Okay, now I have some time to respond.... Pet Peeve: Plots that are just too unbelievable. I can suspend a lot of belief, and I have no problems with an unlikely situation being used as the premise or initiator for a story (these things DO happen), but when they start to pile up, it really annoys me. *muses* Maybe this is why I like SF and Fantasy so much; the genre allows me to suspend more disbelief than a contempary story. *end muse* I can skip over a lot of grammer and spelling mistakes without it bothering me (though I'll stop if there are so many, I have trouble working out what they are saying), but to me, a plot has to be both reasonable and interesting. I like to avoid cliches, too, but it is very hard to avoid them completely. After all, cliches exist because they often DO occur a reasonable amount. The operative word is reasonable. Over-use of cliches makes a story dull. Romance: I've only tried one romance story, and I couldn't avoid bringing in a light spicing of reality -- probably a personality flaw in me as an author. *shrugs* Love-at-first-sight is something I've never experienced, and so I usually don't think it's realistic (see above). That's just me, and I'm sure there are people out there who have experienced this and will object to my statement. Lust-at-first-sight is completely different. I find that totally reasonable and realistic. Transforming that into love would make an interesting and challenging story. Romance stories are often formulaic. Falls Creek Lessons (shameless plug) is a good example. Plot-wise, it is nothing exceptional. It's not your traditional "boy-meets-boy, boy-loses-boy, boy-gets-boy-back-again" plot, but the standard "discovers-love-under-his-nose" type. What makes or breaks a romance story along these lines is simply the quality of the writing: can the reader picture themselves in the story; do they fall in love with the main characters? Trying to do something exceptional or new in a romance is difficult. The good news is that most readers aren't looking for that -- they just want to see two people fall in love, and are usually just imagining themselves as one of those people. My opinion only, of course. Graeme

I happen to like two movies Jim Carey was in: Liar, Liar and whichever Batman movie he played the riddler. So, I can't say that everything he's done is bad.

Hmmm... I think I need my computer taken off me, as I think this is a perfectly reasonable statement: A creature (probably alien) with the unusual name of "it" is having its temperature taken. Graeme

Not only is it an awesome story, but I am stunned at the sheer versatility of TR -- Some Enchanted Evening, Something About Tom, Drama Club, and this story -- so many different storys in so many different styles, and all executed brilliantly! Congratulations, TR! (a very humble) Graeme

Technically, I would argue that circular logic IS logic. It is a self-consistent sequence of arguments to indicate a point. Of course, using an assumption to prove that the assumption is true is rather self-defeating, but all systems of logic work off basic axioms which are just assumed to be true. Circular logic just allows you to pick those basic axioms, and then demonstrate that they are true (after all, you start with they assumption that they are true). Graeme This is post is purely for the purpose of arguing, rather than for any intrinsic deep meaning. If you have a life, you are free to stop reading.

I've just read chapter 20 -- definitely worth the wait. It's good to see some more support coming through. Keep up the excellent work, James! Graeme

Credit should go where it is due: I had the same question regarding the ex-security guard, and I emailed EleCivil aboutr it. All I did above was paraphrase his explanation. Graeme

Hi, Ross, I had the same question about the security guard, and it was explained to me that he's a new teacher (remember his job as a security guard was while he was studying). Allowing for the normal rumour mill, a student overheard a comment about his previous occupation, which then extrapolated out to all the other occupations that was "assigned" to him. So, while a touch confusing at first, it does make sense. Graeme

Aaron, When I read that original post, I took it be a tongue-in-cheek comment. I can't remember if it was before or after Jamie's post in another thread about the editing that AJ did for him, but I was aware that AJ does quite a bit of editing, and so was talking from that side of the fence. There is no doubt in my mind that New Brother is a vastly better story due to your editing. The last chapter you sent back to me was an excellent example of that. Also, as stated above, most, if not all, readers will not notice that work you've done. It may not happen enough, but every so often we writers do get off our collective backsides and publicly thank our editors. We are all aware of how important you are, and how much we need you. So, thanks again, and I hope this didn't distract you too much from your schoolwork. (I'm constantly amazed at how much you work you put into the editing process AND still find time for the other things you do). Graeme PS: The above has NOT been edited by Aaron or reviewed in any way. All mistakes are the responsibility of the author, who will cringe in embarassment when they are pointed out to him....

Hi, I may have sighted this story that doesn't exist, but due to work commitments (also known as being actually required to do some work, for a change) and retiring to a hotel room exhausted at the end of the day, I haven't had a chance to read it. It is on the list of things to be done (unless it disappears on me, which would be a tragic event). Graeme

I liked this one better than you first post. The first one, to me, was more like complex poetry, while this one is prose. As far as the writing itself is concerned, I don't really have much more to say -- it was very well done! Graeme

An interesting question..... I'll start by saying that I have never heard of any dance in Australia being called a Mating Dance. To be perfectly honest, most Australian males don't know how to dance -- their closest equivalent is swaying from side to side on a dance floor while trying to make sure their beers don't spill. Come to think of it, a lot of that also happens off the dance floor, but I think I'm getting off the point. On the rare occasions where mates get up and dance together, it is usually for something like the Zorba the Greek dance, where they are supposed to put arms around each others shoulders, or hold hands, but they usually find some alternative, unless they are actually Greek (or Italian, or....). As Melbourne is supposed to have the second or third largest Greek population outside of Athens, I will admit that I've found many opportunties to dance the Zorba properly. The other alternative is the group dance on the nightclub floor, where they all "dance" (see comments above about swaying from side-to-side) in the same general vicinity, but with a general avoidance of eye contact with anyone in the area. Have I answered the question? Graeme

So if I called you an "address label" you'd hate that? Just trying to be clear? Same for "mailing label"? Do you hate all labels? Or just the ones that are sticky on the back? Love, WBMS :) Tsk, tsk. I would have expected an author of your ability to be able to read.... The word "hate" never appeared in what I wrote. I used the word "dislike" which has a quite different meaning. Having said, I probably would hate it if you called me an "address label"..... Graeme :-)

Welcome, Naiilo! I dislike labels myself, so don't be concerned about that. Everyone is an individual, with unique attributes. Cheers! Graeme

Another great poem, Codey! During the first stanza, I initially thought of all my technophile friends who have to have the latest and greatest, but later on I was thinking of politics, politicians and how people vote. There are so many who blindly follow, without really thinking. Well done! Graeme