Tragic Rabbit

Hmm, I see what you mean. I logged in and a bunch of them said they loved my stories and a guy named Kip asked if I'd do their Author Chats. I said, sure. Definitely a busy chatroom there... Thanks, Des. Kisses... TR

Nifty has a chatroom? TR

True existential fear... TR

Oh, I dunno, 'span' would be past tense of spin: Last week, the magician span the plates in his famous chinaware trick. Or something. I'm not sure it's wrong in your sentence, but it might work better for inanimate objects or for events further in the past...but that's just my feeling about the word. Technically, I imagine it's correct, it's just that 'spun' seems to fit more situations that occur to me at the moment. Was the rhyme deliberately left out of some lines/stanzas? Line&sound patterns varied, too, was that deliberate? Uh, the title, though. I had to snicker...and was mightily tempted to write one of my spoofs. For me, 'the scent of love' is often rather close to that of doggie doo. I think you meant it in a slightly funny way but definitely a sexier way than that. Me, I'd have changed the title to something else. 'Phermones' or 'Scent' or 'You Smell Nice' or something. Just a thought. TR

I like it, but then I generally like prose and poetry with math or science themes. Very cool, a poem about the Fibonacci Sequence. Now write one about Pi... Kisses... TR PS. Pi/Pie is my childhood nickname. Don't laugh, my little brothers' are 'Dumpy Cake' and 'Sugar Plum'.

Yum! What a cutie! But where's the swimsuit photo? My favorite line: If anyone assumed it was just bimbos that entered competitions like this, Mark's proving them wrong. BTW, do British cops still not regularly carry firearms (as US cops do)? Kisses... TR

Gay turning fifteen?s not what it seems, Mornings are shorter, nights filled with dreams; Privacy?s lacking and secrecy short, My room is a sanctum and teenage fort. When Mother comes knocking, calling my name, Sister looking for someone to blame Or when the trash needs taken outside: I lock my door, get headphones and hide. Music at midnight, online till dawn Downloading pix of muscles and brawn, Erasing my cookies with such care That no one would know I had been there. When morning finds me, I close my eyes Envision orchards, trees filled with guys, And I pluck my fruit so quietly That no one suspects but thee and me. Mother keeps asking why I?m so clean Yet my showers take hours unseen, Fusses because of Kleenex I?ve used Whole boxes wadded leave her confused. Fifteen is hard work; gay makes it worse Keeping such secrets feels like a curse; But whom would I tell? Not Mom, not Dad And it?s not the same, emailing GLAAD. Fifteen?s confusing but I am sure That sixteen will prove to be the cure; So I wait for my birthday in spring And all the wisdom next year will bring. *

Evidently I don't sound as everyone imagined, because a certain AD Brit said: OOOOOOOOOOOH! I just heard you. You don't sound camp at all. I was convinced you would sound as camp as a row of tents. I think you sound sexy actually. I'm only camp on alternate Wednesdays. Kisses... TR P.S. Did you know that it's impossible to write (or sleep) when you live next to a six-foot Black drag queen with enormous...speakers?

You'll prob like this bathroom video better, then. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PxvE_iB96rw...ted&search=

Male Restroom Etiquette... and its importance.

Buy Strunk and White's Elements of Style, it's a basic for any writer or student. TR

I am a little fish swimming in a salt sea warm water, soft light quiet shushing sounds rock me sweet to sleep they said that I must leave sometime, some way, somehow I?ve given it thought but you know something? I don?t want to wake I am a little fish deep in an ocean dream warm water, pure light music from heaven rock me soft to sleep *

It made me cry, too. I've passed it on to friends here... TR

as you once were I dreamt of you as you once were, so handsome smooth chin firm gaze snapping, a jealous god and still my eye drawn to those lips, that dimple yes, we were young so long ago when we loved yet yours is still the only face that stops my heart *

* dig me up and brush me clean, then wake me with a kiss; I do not know where I have gone can?t speak what I have seen see this stone beneath my head and earth below my feet, they call me to my dreamless rest to slumber?s coldest bed hush, don?t cry, please make no sound this silence is my home; tired years have left me grateful for this placid peace I?ve found so kiss me all your sweet good byes and lay me down to sleep; close me in and cover me deep with death as my disguise *

Which reminds me of what Pompeius Magnus (106-48 BC) once said: 'Stop quoting laws, we carry swords.' TR

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September 19th is International Talk Like A Pirate Day for more info: http://www.talklikeapirate.com/

Cute, but what makes you think it isn't another LonelyGirl15? TR

They're goony-looking and they're birds, lol. I still like this poem, maybe I just like good wordplay. Kisses... TR

I like it very much, but think the first two stanzas are best and might make a better poem alone. I didn't feel the need for a moral at the ending, necessarily, but found the cutting imagery to be very, very vivid. And no, I've never 'cut'...but I find other ways to self-destruct. Great job, Camy. I also love the goony bird icon thingie. Friend of yours? Kisses... TR PS. I had to look up 'meniscus'.

As I told you in IM, I think this might be the best prose you've ever written. I insist that you finish it. Right now. Love, TR

That's 'striped', then, that you want, not 'stripped'. 'Stripped' means removed or disassembled, like stripped of one's clothing or a stripped-down rifle. Candycanes are striped, flags are striped, that is, they have stripes of color or fabric. I like the ending. Kisses... TR

If the real world reference you want to make is to a world of racist anti-Semitism, you've done a good job. I think that's what WBMS was trying to say, albeit more politely. You really truly either need to lose that phrase or put it in a character's mouth. It's not an actual phrase that's okay to use in narration by anyone other than a Klansman. Seriously. I'm wondering why this phrase 'Jewish Lobby' seems okay to you, and why it's part of your main storyline. I assume you are Gentile, and probably White? Again, 'Jewish Lobby' can be a phrase in the mouth of a character, but as narration, it's highly offensive even to non-Jews like myself. The idea of a secret Jewish cabal controlling a country or world finance is one with a long and unattractively racist history. You simply can't toss in phrases like that without painting your narrator (or you) as an offensive person. If that's your goal, fine, but it doesn't seem that way, you seem to think the phrase can be used factually. In case I'm not being clear enough, I don't mean that you should find another phrase to mean 'Jewish Lobby', I mean that you should question why you think there's actually such a thing as a Jewish Lobby. I agree with sticking to past tense, but either way you have to stick to one single tense. That's not really an option. I also agree about the first chapter being all description. You might want to cut it up and intersperse it with subsequent chapters, introducing the characters as the action unfolds. I'm also of the opinion that overthinking this early in might kill off a story. Since you've only really introduced the characters, and may want to break that up and use the text section by section, that your time is better spent actually writing out the story than posting long posts about your intentions. That's just my personal feeling and something I've learned is true for me, from experience. Asking something specific seems okay to me but don't tell me what you're going to write, write it and then we'll talk. What seems true to me is that more talk equals less writing. Best of luck with your story. Do you have any finished work, short story or longer, that you'd like to send me at Story-Editor@awesomedude.com? Feel free... Kisses... TR I think Camy's suggestion is an excellent one, try short story writing to hone your ability with plot and dialogue. Short stories can always be turned into novels, but novels are a lot harder to finish. Ahem. TR

'Life choice', 'lifestyle'....I guess you could say accepting it was a choice, after all, we could date girls, right? Though we can't help who we're attracted to or fall in love with. Yeah, I resent that, too, Trab, and don't like to use buzz-words because they're usually loaded with the wrong ammo. I guess my 'lifestyle' is pretty gay, in that I live among, talk to and hang out with as high a percentage of queers as possible. That was a choice, on my part, as is dating men. It was also a choice to let my family know, in my teens, that I wasn't straight, and they've really loved me for it. Not. For a conservative, right-wing type guy to publically say he's gay takes guts, he's very likely to lose his office. Which is another reason I just can't fathom Log Cabin Republicans (politically active gay Republicans). Why be part of a party (whether we need any or only two political parties in the US is another topic) that would like to eradicate you from the landscape? In Real Life, I know (biblically and otherwise) Log Cabin Republicans, they seem otherwise to be sensible people. I just noticed that this article originates in Brainerd, Minnesota, location of the fantastic film Fargo, starring William H. Macy, the fantastic actor. Kisses... TR