LuKas!

[Cole Parker]

Very nice short story by J.J.J. LuKas!

I can remember reading it, or something like it, awhile ago. It was good then; it's good now. Like all his writing. Witty and bright and full of fresh air.

The talk at the beginning about short and longer stories is interesting, too. This one is certainly complete as it stands. And it's certainly able to be expanded. I would guess this isn't an unusual phenomenon. I know it happened with me. (and he subtly changes the subject to himself! Without anyone noticing!)

I did the same thing when I wrote Dominos. I wrote the first chapter simply to be a stand alone, short, horrifyingly funny story. It was only after it was written and I was thinking about it that I realized I should develop it into more.

I'd guess most of us have probably experienced this. An idea for a short story simply expands as more ideas are generated while we're writing the short part. I get most of my ideas for stories when I'm reading someone else's work, or writing my own. I'd guess it's just the creative process is activated or stimulated by those two things.

But, that being said, read J.J.'s work. It's wonderful.

C

[Merkin]

...I get most of my ideas for stories when I'm reading someone else's work

Isn't there a word for that? Watch out, J.J.

[Chris James]

I remember reading this before when it was the first chapter of a longer story. Now I wonder why J.J. hasn't given us the whole thing. But I agree with Cole, this piece of J.J.'s work stands alone quite well as a short story.

If you read all of J.J.'s work, which I have, you get this uncanny feeling that you are looking into the knowledge he has of a time and place most readers find unfamiliar. Religion plays an important part, although the characters embrace it in so many different ways. There is usually a preacher and often they are offbeat characters unlike the ones we see and hear about. Characters are very much one of J.J's strengths, and you have to wonder how many of them are based upon real people he has known.

It pays to have a vivid imagination and a good sense of humor when you write about unusual people. But although some of J.J's dialogue cracks me up I feel his broad understanding of human folly beneath that blanket of words. His characters are individuals in the best sense of that word...and there always seems to be music.

So thanks J.J., and perhaps you should post the rest of JKLM on the AD site. It's a really good story in the entire.

[Lugnutz]

I have nothing to add that hasn't already been said. Read it.

http://www.awesomedude.com/jjjanicki/lukas.htm

[J.J.Janicki]

Thanks for your kind words, guys.

But anyway, I think early on one of my bigger problems was way too many asides. Breaking the fourth wall and all that... which often worked on Malcom in the Middle... and even better on Monty Python... and occasionaly, I'm guessing it worked for me as well. But still, I was doing it too often, and in the case of the longer story LuKas came from, I think NOW that it was getting in the way. Especially since I was writing it in the third person.

Even if I still like the story idea. A torturous affair involving a lapsed Baptist boy and a schizophrenic Mormon boy. What could possibly be better?

But anyway, I'm thinking if I attempt to tell the story behind the story, then even if that original story's still there, it also becomes an entirely different story.

It still remains to be seen if I can make that work, though.

But before being swallowed up by March Madness again, um...

Well, again, thanks, and hopefully, I will return soon enough.

[colinian]

J.J., leave the asides ALONE! Don't fuck with what works so well. It's like a trademark part of your stories. Hear?!

Colin

[Cole Parker]

Yes, they provide some of that fresh air I was talking about. They add a dose of irreverence that is delightful.

C

[Richard Norway]

OMG, Colin spoke a bad word. My ears are frothing. How could we have corrupted him so much?

And JJ, well done!

Don't forget that the humor of my voice is in the absurdity of what I say...not to you JJ.

[J.J.Janicki]

So.... you guys are saying that constant mind chatter is a GOOD thing? Aside from when I'm trying to meditate, I mean. Then it's not a good thing. Not really. But anyway...

Well, at least I haven't yet inflicted of my early drafts on anyone but my long-suffering proof readers.

[Camy]

So.... you guys are saying that constant mind chatter is a GOOD thing?

It can be, and with you it is. I agree with Colin:

J.J., leave the asides ALONE! Don't fuck with what works so well. It's like a trademark part of your stories. Hear?!

[Rutabaga]

A JJ Janicki story without asides would be like a MacGyver episode without some kind of brilliant techno-contraption at the end.

The dictionary sequence in this story is priceless.

Worthy Pick from the Past.

R