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Bashing a Queer by Nigel Gordon


Lugnutz

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Well, when you've been around as long and as much as you and I have, Pecs, the information in the footnotes may be nothing new. But you'd be surprised how informative it can be to some readers!

Well done, Nigel.... I thoroughly enjoyed this one!

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It's good, but I could've done without the footnotes.

This was read by three readers and the editor, they all raised questions about the meaning of certain terms and suggested that I explain them. It was a choice of adding the endnotes or putting explanation in the text, so I decided on the addition of endnotes.

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I have read books where the footnotes were longer than some of the chapters, arrrgh, I think what you did was most appropriate. Moving on, lest you think my commentary is all about footnotes, I liked the story.

I think every author here has written a story where the hero defends a friend and the bad guys get their asses kicked, I know I have. It must be some inner muse that forces us to want a level playing field for the characters. This isn't to say that real life always gives us such heroes, but in fiction we seek them out as a reflection of our desires.

If real bullies always got their comeuppance we would have to build more hospitals for their battered bodies. In most cases the gay kid lacks the fortitude to develop the skills Nigel's hero has, it's not in the DNA. But friendship is not about straight or gay, it is a mental calculation in which people judge one another worthy. Well done, Nigel. You've given us something good to ponder.

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I have read books where the footnotes were longer than some of the chapters, arrrgh, I think what you did was most appropriate. Moving on, lest you think my commentary is all about footnotes, I liked the story.

There are some I have read where the footnotes are better than the novel, take Terry Prachett's Discworld Series, the best part is often the footnotes.

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SPOILER ALERT

Good story.

I think Chris is right: there's something in the bullying of gay kids that really resonates with us as writers. Some of this no doubt is due to personal experiences, but there's a dramatic element in it to, and a visceral right vs. wrong element, an important self-esteem element, and a lot more to decorate these stories.

I also agree that not all people are genetically suited to fighting. Some people have a real love of it; some actively hide from it. I have no idea if there is a disposition toward either of these extremes that is associated with being gay. But it does make sense, if we're writing stories about a gay kid and about bullies, that for the story to work, usually, the kid will be the muggee, not the mugger.

This story was very satisfying because the mugger got his just desserts. Oh that real life could work this way more often.

C

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A delightful story, well constructed and nicely written. It would be a good basis for a short film, perhaps by first time film students.

I love the way Nigel weaves a mysterious nature of the aikido and references to Zen into the story, and the footnotes help that.

The discussion on the Holocaust is most welcome.

Cross culture stories like this are themselves quite enlightening and important as well as entertaining.

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Guest Dabeagle

I wanted to add a little, and this too has a spoiler in order to discuss it.

It's always a bit hard for me to accept very young, deadly, martial arts type people. I do know that they exist, but personally, I feel an instant thread of disbelief. Maybe because movies like '3 Ninjas' were part of my youth, who knows. I did find some things that I have been thinking about and are, story wise, worth mentioning - or commenting on. Some of this may be that I just don't have experience with them, and so it a matter of perception. The Main Character (MC) tells Tim that his family doesn't have money, just that they inherited the house. But the family can afford to send him skiing in Germany and spend New Years in New York - and send him for month long trips to Japan? It seems expensive to me, and they have another child.

One thing that I wondered the first go around was that MC told Tim that kicking the bully's behind wasn't for him, and yet he seems to contradict that when speaking to the teacher later. Is this just me or did anyone else get that impression?

Obviously these are small details in an otherwise engaging story, especially the Holocaust bit as there are plenty of people who may make the same assumption that only Jewish people were targeted. More to the point it also shows that anyone can twist the truth or only share part of it, to their benefit. Even though, kind of rightly so, only white American males can be bigots or what have you, it was shocking to have that point of view from the bully - it was alien for me and very fresh.

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This was read by three readers and the editor, they all raised questions about the meaning of certain terms and suggested that I explain them. It was a choice of adding the endnotes or putting explanation in the text, so I decided on the addition of endnotes.

One paragraph as an afterword at the end of the story would've been fine, and is the traditional way all novelists handle technical and foreign language terms.

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