Sperm donation...

[Bruin Fisher]

I was listening on BBC Radio 4 while driving, at about a quarter past eleven this morning to a programme about a shortage of sperm donors to enable single women and lesbian couples (as well as infertile straight couples) to have children in the UK. I caught the following snippet comparing the much better situation in Denmark: "You have to remember the sperm bank makes money out of the sperm donated. If you have a particularly popular donor, you want to keep him on your books as long as possible, extract as much sperm from him as possible. That way you can make money hand over fist." I nearly drove the car into a tree.

[Cole Parker]

They could advertise they have donations by the handful.

C

[Lugnutz]

Mouthful?

[Merkin]

Had I but known I would have saved those socks.

[The Pecman]

They could advertise they have donations by the handful.

Bucket-load would've been good as well.

[Camy]

Had I but known I would have saved those socks.

Oh, yick Merkin! But it brings to mind:

My Sock Monkey's left me

now I've found a real man

He sits there in the corner

plotting big sock monkey plans

It was me and him for many years

we loved so very much

Whenever he got crusty

I'd wash him out post brunch

He'd dry upon the line

and when the day was done

it was back inside to my bedroom

for another night of fun

He'd nod at all my dreams

and whimper sweet harmonies

He'd soothe the pangs of guilt I felt

as I sailed the unknown seas

But he's not keen on my beau

I've seen him pout and glare

If looks could kill my sweetheart would

have fallen down the stairs

[Merkin]

Love it!

[Lugnutz]

Poor monkey. It wouldn't happen if you didn't spank the monkey.